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-   -   My girlfriend still loves me but lost feelings for me. What does she mean? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=594809)

  • Aug 28, 2011, 08:56 AM
    timmy8493
    My girlfriend still loves me but lost feelings for me. What does she mean?
    My girlfriend of almost 6 months told me she needed a break and some time to herself. I don't get it cause I do give her space and time to herself. She said she has lost feelings for me out of no where. She thought about ending it with me but she said she didn't cause she knew that she was going to ask for me back. I love her a lot and I don't want to lose her. She said she still loves me but she lost feelings for which I don't get. Please help me I'm very sad of losing this girl.
  • Aug 28, 2011, 09:06 AM
    odinn7
    Best advice I can give you... dump her. I know it sounds hard to do but with what you just said here, you are in for an emotional roller coaster if you stay with her. Once someone tells you they have lost feelings for you and need time for themselves, it's pretty much over. You're just going to keep going through all kinds of problems with her as she will probably string you along and it's going to make things harder on you.

    Her telling you this means that A) she has found someone else and wants to try them out B) she's tired of you but can't tell you C) both A and B... You're better off not even dealing with this. Save yourself the pain and break it off now.
  • Aug 28, 2011, 01:17 PM
    agh1990
    From the sounds of it, I think she may have been using the wrong word when she said she still loves you, and perhaps she meant it in the sense of she still cares for you. Perhaps she has lost the feelings of wanting to be with you, but is scared to break if off fully because at the end of the day, she does still care for your feelings and doesn't want to see you get hurt.

    The best thing to do is to sit back because, at the end of the day, you can't force someone to be with you, and it's just as unfair for her to be in a relationship she doesn't want to be in as this situation is for you.

    I think you need to leave her for a few days, and then after that period ask to speak to her to see where she is and what her feelings are. And if it's that she doesn't want to be with you, I think you need to accept that and not make her feel even more guilty for making the decision.

    Good luck, and I hope everything works out for you.
  • Aug 28, 2011, 02:31 PM
    talaniman
    I don't know how old you both are, but when feelings change for one partner, and they ask for space, or a break, give it to them, and leave them alone, and go back to doing your thing, without them. In this way you won't degrade yourself with whining and begging, and can find better options, and opportunities to be happy.

    If her feelings change back, you will hopefully at least, be able to decide if its worth all this dram, and confusion. So don't worry about her feelings, just deal with your own, and if her mind changes, and she misses you, she will let you know, then you can decide if its what you want, or if this is just going to happen again.

    Some people change their minds many times, and act on feelings they know nothing about, or are not sure what they feel.

    Leave her alone to find out.
  • Aug 28, 2011, 05:17 PM
    Homegirl 50
    6 months is not a long time. It is just enough time to begin to know a person. Maybe she likes you but not as much as she used to. Leave her alone. Don't "give space", break it off and move on. If there is something to rekindle it will happen, if not, you have not continued on a roller coaster.
  • Aug 28, 2011, 08:02 PM
    timmy8493
    Her friends tell her that I'm the right boy fore
  • Aug 28, 2011, 08:11 PM
    talaniman
    How old are you? Doesn't really matter what her friends say does it? She will do as she pleases won't she?
  • Aug 28, 2011, 08:48 PM
    timmy8493
    I'm 18
  • Aug 29, 2011, 06:05 AM
    Homegirl 50
    What her friends tell her has nothing to do with how she feels.
    You both are young. There will be other girls. This was a learning and trial period and it didn't work out.
    Time to lick your wounds and move on.
  • Aug 29, 2011, 07:10 AM
    talaniman
    Chalk this up as a learning experience, and a preview of the fun you will have dating many in the future.

    If you stay cool, calm, and collected, and don't get carried away by your feelings, and are cautious who you give your heart to, then you will enjoy your a$$ off.

    Just be honest, and don't be a player, as you already know how it hurts to think you got something and then find out you don't! That's the difference between a player, and a GOOD human being. HONESTY.

    Read my signature below. Especially the one about options.
  • Aug 29, 2011, 08:45 AM
    timmy8493
    She also says that she doesn't wannna break up with me cause she will want me back and the same thing goes for me
  • Aug 29, 2011, 09:23 AM
    Homegirl 50
    Well if you want to be toyed with, stay and don't complain about the ride.
    If you want some pride, break it off.
    She needs to make up her mind what she wants but you don't need to sit at her feet like an obedient dog while she does it
  • Aug 29, 2011, 10:36 AM
    talaniman
    Please let me know how that waiting until she wants you back works out for you. Did she give you a time she would want you back? Even if you get back together next week, chances are you will get dumped again very soon after.

    Especially if she sees you having fun, without her. She will surely bring you confusion through her words, but her actions won't match. She already knows the effects her words have on you as you are so eager to get her back, you will wait to see if she comes back.

    She is looking around at her options, and you better be also, as being stuck after you get dumped is a miserable disaster waiting to happen.
  • Aug 29, 2011, 04:26 PM
    timmy8493
    She has no feelings for anyone else
  • Aug 29, 2011, 04:41 PM
    Homegirl 50
    So she'll want you back when and if she is finished discovering what her feeling are. In the meantime you sit obediently and wait. That is sad.
    Let her go do her thing and you do yours. If you met up at another time, fine. In the meantime you have not been sitting around waiting for her to make up her mind.
    You are an option to her she knows she can pick up when and if she wants. It that what you want to be?
  • Aug 29, 2011, 05:28 PM
    timmy8493
    She wanted to hangout too
  • Aug 29, 2011, 05:37 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Like I said you are an option. She wants to keep you around in plain sight while she figures out what she wants to do. That is pretty selfish, but it sounds like you are willing to do this and that is pretty pitiful.
    How old are the two of you?
  • Aug 29, 2011, 06:21 PM
    timmy8493
    18 and 16. She said she still has little bit of feelings for me
  • Aug 29, 2011, 08:20 PM
    Homegirl 50
    She might but you need to leave her alone. She is pretty young. You both moved too fast.
  • Aug 29, 2011, 09:52 PM
    timmy8493
    Its like if we are just frinds

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