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-   -   What's wrong with my relationship? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=593621)

  • Aug 19, 2011, 04:53 PM
    confusedboy2333
    What's wrong with my relationship?
    My girlfriend is probably the perfect girl. She makes me food and doesn't make me pay for anything and doesn't require much. But I just turned 18 and I'm going off to college and I just don't think I want to be with her anymore. It would be so dumb for me to dump her because she is just so good to me and I do love her and care about her. I can't stand to see her cry when I tell her these feelings but I just don't think I want to be a boyfriend anymore. Some days I feel awesome but some days like this I feel terrible and want to break up. Could there be a problem in my head? I just don't know what to do.
  • Aug 20, 2011, 01:01 AM
    Triysle
    There is nothing wrong with you. You're at a pivotal point in your life right now, a time that most people use to figure themselves out and learn about how they fit into the bigger picture.

    I know it sounds selfish but you have to be happy and satisfied with your own life before you share it with someone else. You were lucky to be able to have someone amazing in your life, and it will hurt to lose that. The questions you have to ask yourself are simple - Am I satisfied with where my life is right now? Can I continue to grow and improve my life while maintaining this relationship?

    If you can honestly answer yes to those questions, then perhaps you should try to make things work; otherwise, make the best choice for yourself. Even if you stayed together, you may just be postponing the inevitable. And trust me, it's much easier to mutually end a relationship than be forced to go to court for visitation rights ;)

    ~ Tee
  • Aug 20, 2011, 07:29 AM
    talaniman
    There is nothing wrong with you if you are honest with yourself, and can be honest with others also. Sounds like your girl deserves honesty.

    So your challenge is how to be honest with her, and grateful for having a good person in your life.
  • Aug 30, 2011, 11:43 AM
    agh1990
    If you read back your own question you'd probably have your answer.
    You said that you don't want to break up with her because:
    - She makes you food
    - She doesn't make you pay for anything
    - She doesn't require much
    - You can't stand to see her cry.

    Are you sure you love and care about her? Or is it that really, you want to be free and single when you go off to college but you don't want to give up being looked after by your girlfriend?

    You can't have it both ways, you need to decide. And if you're only with her for the free meals and because you don't want to upset her, then you're not really being fair on her.

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