Is there a way to have a DC motor start up and ramp up slowly to speed (at a defined rate) as soon as it gets power via relay or something without user intervention? And if so, when the time elaped and the power gets cut, can it automaticaly reset to the start-up prefrence?

Nope... not in the motor itself. But through a specially made external motor speed controller it would be possible. Not familiar if any are actually made I could direct you to... but I know being an Engineer that it could be done.

Maybe a heavy weighted flywheel, it would be slow to start up, slow to stop, and CHEAP.