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-   -   Who's the father (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=591898)

  • Aug 9, 2011, 12:45 PM
    Nyprcubanita718
    Who's the father
    Hi my name is amanda and I'm 20 yrs old. Ive cheated on my husband. Im so ashamed. Ive had sex wuth another man on the 8 & 30 of April. Ive had sex with my husband the 17-25. My due date is jan 18 2012 and my last period was on the 11-15.my conception date is on the 26 of April.ive had sex with my husband on the 17-25

    Please.help me I'm so ashamed I just want to live a stress free environment for my child and do the best I can from now on.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 12:51 PM
    Lyra123

    Paternity test to be sure, but you cannot have gotten pregnant on the 26th from sex on the 30th. I am going to say your husband because you had sex with him one day prior to the conception. Sperm can only live a few days in the body, not weeks. The sperm from the other man on the 8th would not have lived long enough to conceive by him on the 26th

    But as I said, paternity test to be sure
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:03 PM
    Nyprcubanita718

    My doc said sperm lives up to 3 days. Before I tested pregnant I dome how jbew I was and when I cheated on tge 26 somehow I knew I was pregnant before I cheated I just need to be positive so I can stop questiong myself and be happy. Im to emarreses to ask my doctor
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:08 PM
    joypulv
    It won't do any good to ask your doctor, but you should never be ashamed - they've heard it all before.
    Doctors base due dates on last period date, so there's no way to know who the father is until the baby is born and you can do DNA testing. That is, if you are willing to ask one or both men for DNA.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:11 PM
    Nyprcubanita718

    Omg I don't feel bettee. But I wasn't ovulating on the 30
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:13 PM
    Lyra123
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Nyprcubanita718 View Post
    My doc said sperm lives up to 3 days. Before i tested pregnant i dome how jbew i was and when i cheated on tge 26 somehow i knew i was pregnant before i cheated i just need to be positive so i can stop questiong my self and be happy. Im to emarreses to ask my doctor

    Yes sperm lives up to three days, in some cases up to 5 I've read. Never be embarrassed for the doctor.

    If the conception date was the 26th, and you also cheated on the 26th, you need to get a paternity test to be sure.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:27 PM
    Nyprcubanita718

    But I didn't have sex on the 26 I had sex on the 25 .so lets say I sperm lives up to 5 days it would be my husbands and my conepetion date would be on the 30. Or near it.

    If my doc told me 3 days then the 26 of conception would mean I have sex thee days.ago . Ialso wasn't ovulatinh that late. Its so confussing
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:29 PM
    J_9

    Never be embarrassed to talk to your doctor. The doctors and us nurses have heard it all before. Believe me, I'm an obstetric nurse and I've heard it all before.

    Unfortunately, there is no way to know who the father is until the baby is born and a paternity test is done.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:31 PM
    Lyra123
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Nyprcubanita718 View Post
    But i didnt have sex on the 26 i had sex on the 25 .so lets say i sperm lives up to 5 days it would be my husbands and my conepetion date would be on the 30. Or near it.

    If my doc told me 3 days then thw 26 of conception would mean i have sex thee days.ago . Ialso wasnt ovulatinh that late. Its so confussing

    I'm sorry, please type clearly. I cannot understand what you type. If you did not have sex with the other man within a week before conception, he is not the father. I may be wrong, but I do not think that he could be if you only had sex with him the 8th and the 30th, while the date of conception is the 26th.

    Please get a paternity test.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:33 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Lyra123 View Post
    I'm sorry, please type clearly. I cannot understand what you type. If you did not have sex with the other man within a week before conception, he is not the father. I may be wrong, but I do not think that he could be if you only had sex with him the 8th and the 30th, while the date of conception is the 26th.

    Please get a paternity test.

    However, we don't know EXACTLY when conception occurred. It is all just an educated guess. ;)
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:37 PM
    Synnen

    Were you TRACKING your ovulation?

    If not, then you do NOT know when conception happened---or when your fertile dates are. Mine did not follow the standard 2 weeks before/after your period dates, so it took forever for me to conceive.

    The ONLY way you are EVER going to know the child's father is to have a paternity test.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:46 PM
    Lyra123
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by J_9 View Post
    However, we don't know EXACTLY when conception occurred. It is all just an educated guess. ;)

    Good point J, my mistake.

    Then I stick with the later response of mine, Get a paternity test.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:47 PM
    Nyprcubanita718

    Thank you RN my doctor also said it was an estimated guess

    And no I did not have sex with any other man execpt my husband while I was ovulating . Ive only.had sex once on the date of April .8 & 30 and no not with my husband the same day.

    My period is always 3-Four days sometimes 3.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:51 PM
    J_9

    Again, as Synn mentioned, unless you were tracking your ovulation there is no way to tell who the father is until a DNA test is done.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:51 PM
    Nyprcubanita718

    Ive also had an ultra sound on the 7-13-11 & I was 12weeks 6 days if that is any help
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:53 PM
    J_9

    I'm sorry hun, I wish I could be of more help. But all of pregnancy is nothing more than an educated guess until the baby is born.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 01:53 PM
    Lyra123

    The only real way to know, is a test. We all have said this.
  • Aug 9, 2011, 02:03 PM
    Nyprcubanita718

    Okay thank you woman so much. I guess ill just have to stand up to my doctor and see what I can do
  • Aug 9, 2011, 02:05 PM
    J_9

    Remember that whatever you tell your doctor is private. Your husband will NOT find out.

    He will, though, find out when it comes time for the paternity test. So you might want to come clean now.

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