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-   -   A heart broken in half and then a quarter? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=587926)

  • Jul 17, 2011, 12:12 PM
    anxietyridden
    A heart broken in half and then a quarter?
    Four years ago, I moved to a foreign country. Shortly after I fell in love with someone. I had so much fun with him. He seemed so original and downright amazing. Then I broke up with him.. but really regretted it after (I had some issues with him being a few years younger). I tried to ask him back and he refused, being very harsh, saying he would never love me again. It was agonizing pain. I felt like I deserved all of it.

    Then several months after this happened, I started having feelings for a close friend. He and I started seeing each other; I told him I was not ready to be in a relationship. I did not feel over my ex. I saw someone else, a different guy from the past. The close friend took this as 'cheating' on him. I apologised and never did it again. I totally committed to him. Then I found out that he had a really bad temper and anger management issues, and then he became violent, which he blames on me.

    I moved out. And then I ran into my original ex. He took my number and we hung out as friends. Nothing happened. But I felt feeling start to come back. He invited me to hang out with him, then again the next day, but then canceled. Then I never heard from him again, and I don't know why.

    Suddenly all the pain has come back. I'm really, really, really really confused. I don't get how I am not over the first ex, and I don't know why he wanted to hang out with me then just stop. And I don't know what to do about the 2nd ex. He want to marry me.

    So confused... help me?
  • Jul 17, 2011, 01:48 PM
    talaniman

    For once in your life, be single and free, and let no one for any reason stop you exploring your world on your own terms. This will allow you to heal, and grow, and build a life that makes you happy, without depending on an arse hole with issues to make you happy.

    You have allowed yourself to settle for less than you deserve, an the results are obvious, you depend on jerks and half a$$es.

    Enough of that, make your own self happy, and leave the boys alone so you can see when a man appears.

    Can you do that for yourself?? Why the hell can't you??
  • Jul 17, 2011, 01:50 PM
    anxietyridden
    Comment on talaniman's post
    Thank you I'm really enjoying your idea =)
  • Jul 17, 2011, 01:52 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Let me see, you break up and dump the guys and wonder why they don't want to be back, Or if they do come as a friend, you issue it.

    You need to slow down, learn to be happy with yourself and not "need" a man. Then you slow down and get to know them and respect them. But remember break up is break up and you move on.

    So yes if you are broken hearted you brought it on yourself

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