Does he want to end the relationship?
Sorry if this is long... I am including all details because I would like to paint an accurate, factual, picture to get your opinions.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year now. We are both in our mid 20s.
When we first started dating, things were going great; no fighting, no arguments, just some good discussions. Then, about 5 months into the relationship, we got into a fight, and he ended things with me over e-mail, saying that he loves me, but that he hasn't been happy, and doesn't see a future together.( the fight was insignificant- it was an excuse to do what he wanted, which was to end things) After a few weeks apart, I contacted him to let him know that although he hurt me with the "breakup letter" I took some time to think about what we did wrong, where I was wrong, and how I was willing to work on things, if he was. He again took a few days to think about it, and came back saying that I was right, that if you love a person you can't just give up and leave, and that he was willing to work on our relationship and communicate.
Fast forward 4 more months. Again, we get into a fight, and he tells me ( this time in person) that he can no longer be with me because he isn't happy. Again, I cry for weeks, and try to figure out what went wrong ( and there were a few physical issues I was aware of that were pretty important that I was ignoring )After 3 weeks of no contact, I again reach out to him. He explains that he did want to end things, because he felt smothered, and needed his own space ( I would agree with that I didn't realize just how much time we were spending together: I love people around me at all times, he is more introverted, and needs his alone time... )I said that the solution isn't to break up, but to communicate ( which was the theme of our last breakup), and that instead of ending things he should have just told me that he needed his space, and if I loved him ( which I do) I would have given it to him. He agreed.
Again, we agreed to work things out, this time really paying attention to all the issues...
Fast forward to week after we "got back together". I go out with my friends, he goes out with his... I receive a phone call around 11pm. He tells me he loves me, misses me, and will see me later. I say Ditto and hang up the phone. I get home around 2am... and no call from my boyfriend. I call him, no answer. I get mad ( because I presume that your boyfriend should "check in" with you at some point to make sure you get home OK... to tell you he is home OK... etc... ) In midst of my anger I sent a text message; something along the lines of "you don't care about me, so i don't care about you anymore." I don't hear from him the next day, so I go to speak with him. He again tells me that we got back together on the basis that we would have more space, that he doesn't want to feel the need to call me "just to check in", that he called me because he wanted to, not because he had to, and he doesn't want to be in this relationship unless he gets more space. He also mentioned that he DOES realize that it is selfish, and him wanting more space doesn't mean that he doesn't want to spend time together, but simply that he needs to do more on his own.
I told him that I understood, and because I loved him, I would give him the space he needed. I kissed him goodbye and said "talk to you later". He said "bye baby", and I left.
It has been two weeks... I haven't even received a phone call... what's going on?
