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-   -   Overburdened with guilt (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=583323)

  • Jun 21, 2011, 09:57 PM
    pink_jacket
    Overburdened with guilt
    I fell in love with someone 3 years ago when my parents invited this guy home as a proposal. They got us engaged and eventually we were married on paper. Then my parents decided that the guy has weird habits and wanted to break the marriage. I insisted I would stay, he was back home in our country and I was in Dubai. Seems like this was the biggest mistake I made being sincere.

    Here goes the remaining story, I helped him get a job in Dubai and he came, I had a very good sal, and he had only a very small and beginner one, we got a home, car, furniture etc.. Life was great but I was the one paying for all expenses, then he started taking over my debit cards and my account saying he was my hubby, never shared his with me saying he didn't have any money, I gave. I was pregnant.. wow the happiest woman ever.. then he asked me to take a loan of 150,000 dhs and I did. He wanted to invest in business and promised he would pay the premiums from the profit.. the money goes in his hands, now I'm completely ignored, left alone, preggy and heartbroken in one room of the 2 bed flat we had.

    Car transferred to his name by now by emotional blackmail.. baby born and 7 months he divorced me and threw me out of the house. When I went to court he threated to take the baby, I got custody and divorce.

    Today I am overburdened with guilt, the above is a short story of what I gave him, there were lots of bonuses, and extras that went in his hand too. More over with him I lost money, car, my parents trust because they said they warned me earlier, and above everything the beautiful dream I had made to live with him. Still start each day of my work looking at his pic, the man who beat me, insulted me with bad words, slapped me, lied about me in court.

    Today me and my son live by ourselves, he seldom visits him. Only when my dad makes them meet in a park. Where am I now? Happier, job goes on, premium of loans still being paid by me, recession, high peak work, and more over trying hard to be there for my son. After work take him to parks, malls and play with him, die in bed every night at 11 with guilt and sadness that fills my heart.

    What shall I do? How can I move on? Please help me!
  • Jun 21, 2011, 11:21 PM
    BK201
    You have had your hard times, and I think it is enough. This guy is like a bad curse, don't think about how happy you could have been with him. DO NOT THINK at all. Start doing small things which makes you happy. Like going to some classes, or meeting with friends, or taking the kid out everyday which you are already doing. Your kid will know how hard you are struggling to make the ends meet. Do your best to give him a happy life and make sure he is a good guy unlike his daddy.
    Life is in your hand don't let the thoughts of that trash man ruin it.
  • Jun 22, 2011, 01:08 PM
    talaniman

    Be glad you got rid of this fool, and have a chance to heal, and rebuild a life that you enjoy for you, and your son, without him. It will get better as time goes on, and as hard as it is now, you will be happy again. It just takes more time. Keep looking forward, at what could be, and not back, at what was.

    Good luck to you and your son, he needs your smiles and love.
  • Jun 26, 2011, 11:07 PM
    pink_jacket
    @ bk201 and talaniman, thanks guys that was really sweet of you. Saying is easier I guess, I'm trying hard but fighting alone is difficult especially when a tiny life is dependent on your decisions. Hopefully I ll be happier one day.
  • Jun 26, 2011, 11:55 PM
    BK201
    Yes, don't give up yet. Life isn't easy for anyone, even for the President. Keep the hope.

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