My son is 3 years old and the bio dad has never even attempted to see him he knew when I was pregnant the baby was his. I did not list a father on the birth certificate and paternity has not been established my husband amd I have been together since my son was 2 months old and he wants to adopt him is there any way that he could adopt him without the bio dads consent maybe because of abandonmemt or something.

Maybe. Family Court will require that you identify the father and try to get his permission. However, if there has been no attempt at contact and he does not respond to attempts to get his permission a court MAY grant the adoption.

You really need an attorney to prepare the adoption petition. So shop around for one, who can advise you what you need to do to get the father's permission or show the court you have tried to.

Part of the issue is that of course there has been ( it appears) no order of custody, no request for a paternity test to prove he was the father, and no request for child support.

He is not behind and can not be considered behind if there was never any court order for child support.

He can of course merely claim he did not believe child to be his, and that you never came after him, so he did not think he was the father. ** think about it,

So while you could try, he has some good defense.

The best way normally is if he was forced to pay support, he gladly signs over rights to get out of paying.

But your first attempt will be to see if he agrees to pay