Ive had sexual pleasure, I've had it just giving it to myself, for a long time. And now I get the same feeling when I have sex, (only when I'm on top) I'm not sure if its an orgasm or not, because I never seem to moan. I can't really explain how it feels either, it lasts for about.. 5 seconds... or longer.. and when its over I feel worn out and I don't want sex for a little while. I never thought it was an orgasm because I didn't "make noise" and it didn't last long, but maybe it is? Because I can't figure out any other explanation for it.. can anybody explain this?

Forget the sex movies, porno movies, sex TV, all of those stupid things.

It is more of an effect, fake, pretend.

There is no reason to moan. If you do not moan does not mean it is not an orgasm. Does not mean it does not feel good.

Everybody is different in the bedroom. Some makes noise and some do not. It is all about having fun.

Joe

Is there anything else that it could be? Or do you think its definitely an orgasm ? And if so, how do I go about telling my boyfriend I've been having them ever since we started having sex? He never seems to ask why I just suddenly stop after I went rather fast and made him feel amazing. And when I stop, he uses his hands to keep me going and I'm really sensative down there after whatever it is I feel happens, so.. it doesn't feel all that good when he urges me to keep going..

When you are having an orgasm you can tell. It is really unexplainable but you will knoe when you're having one. If you have to ask if you're having and orgasm you probably aren't. Believe me I knew tha first time that is what it was. Heavenly!!

Nah, it is. I just thought it was some other pleasure, because it had been happening so much. But now I know.

I'm a guy so I can't tell you how you are "supposed" to feel. An orgasm can even feel different from time to time. Sometimes it can hit hard and fast, and sometimes it can be drawn out, sometimes stronger and sometimes weaker.

Of course there are different sensations that can get you there too, with c1itoral vs g spot or oral vs intercourse.

The fact that after you have this "sensation" you don't want to be touched because you are too sensitive leads me to think you have had an orgasm. I dated one girl who was absolutely done when she was done... not to be mean, but the sensations were too much.

This is also something I've seen especially after oral sex, that when it hits the sensations can be too much the guy needs to back off... as in the girl is pushing you away with her hands...

One thing you can also try is if he's on top missionary and his chest is raised off you you can reach down and self stimulate the c1itoris with your fingers while he's inside. One partner did this and it worked wonders. It startled me a little the first time, but don't be embarrassed. Really, the idea that she wanted so badly to get off and dropped her inhibitions was a turn on. And later I was able to stimulate her in the same way and get her to climax.

Likewise, another position where you can self stimulate is when he's coming from behind you. You'll get the sensation of penetration, but then you can stimulate the c1itoris to help actually get somewhere.

Be open with your guy and don't be afraid to tell him what you like and what doesn't do anything for you.

Yea, I've tried that when he was on top. I don't think he likes me doing that much, because he feels as if I don't get enough pleasure from him, so I have to resort to doing it myself. I don't know. Thank you :-)

OK. Well... his attitude sucks. Is he willing to stimulate you with his fingers at the c1itoris and are you able to tolerate it, as in not too sensitive?

Again, I know it might not work that way for you. But the girl that I was able to stim this way would early on tell me when she wanted that and give some clues... until I understood what she needed more and then she didn't have to direct me so much. I know. Its not sexy to be a traffic cop in bed.

But unfortunately, like I mentioned, the next girl HATED that direct stim... so that might not work. I thought after the first girl I was king of the bedroom. Oops. All the rules changed. ;) oh well. That's half the fun, figuring it out.

In the end, I think you need to do what's good for you. You aren't asking for anything unreasonable, and some self stim isn't some great offense if he really only wants to please you. If it turns out that he's too uptight or he's just not a very giving lover, well then you know.

You don't need a perfect lover in bed to have a great relationship, but sexual compatibility is something that you should be thinking about. Its like any other phase of a relationship... when one partner stops trying and the other is doing all the work, something is going to have to give.

The fact that you had to ask tells me it's not an orgasm. When having sex you can still climax without having an orgasm. There is all different feelings for each individual. I think you are just climaxing. Orgasm's make me loose control of whatever I'm doing. It becomes all hot and stuffy, the feeling is almost different every time I have one. I become all flustered and feel really good, that good I can't stop smiling! My skin becomes so sensitive everywhere on my body that just the slightest touch makes me shiver. That's my orgasm!!

What you describe pamela, is what I feel. I'm pretty sure it is an orgasm, what else would it be? Thanks =]

Well if you are so sure it was an orgasm then why did you ask :)

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Originally Posted by laylow80

Ive had sexual pleasure, ive had it just giving it to myself, for a long time. and now i get the same feeling when i have sex, (only when im on top) im not sure if its an orgasm or not, because i never seem to moan. I can't really explain how it feels either, it lasts for about ..5 seconds...or longer..and when its over i feel worn out and i dont want sex for a little while. I never thought it was an orgasm because i didnt "make noise" and it didnt last long, but maybe it is? because i can't figure out any other explanation for it..can anybody explain this??

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You do have orgasms!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by laylow80

Ive had sexual pleasure, ive had it just giving it to myself, for a long time. and now i get the same feeling when i have sex, (only when im on top) im not sure if its an orgasm or not, because i never seem to moan. I can't really explain how it feels either, it lasts for about ..5 seconds...or longer..and when its over i feel worn out and i dont want sex for a little while. I never thought it was an orgasm because i didnt "make noise" and it didnt last long, but maybe it is? because i can't figure out any other explanation for it..can anybody explain this??

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So you are caught in silly frustumorphia, frustumorphia is the phenomenon in which all those frusted people who never had sex talk about there super potency. This is the reason, when some body like you get tensed

Did it feel good? Do you want to do it again? And again? And again
Then then yes;... you got your darts off. Enjoy the moment. Again and again on so on.

Orgasm is different for everybody. You describe a very sensual and nice one! Good for you!

Moaning or the lack of it means nothing! Except Hollywood (although how would you show an orgasm on the screen without some other method?)

You're boyfriend sounds a little selfish and rude though-if you don't mind me saying.

Best wishes, and here's to many more orgasms for you!

I think it is if you want it to last longer try kegal workouts

While I won't be the one here with the popular answer... I must say that just because there are peaks and valleys does not mean your having an orgasm. Sex can be a bit like the ups and downs of a roller coaster. And still feel so good you want more of it... But an actual orgasm is something like the feeling getting better and better and better until you really don't think you can stand it anymore... then you peak and come over the edge. It builds and builds. You can have many small hills but only one big mountain. YOU WILL KNOW if it's the big one. No matter what anyone else says... you will know. Just listen to your body and let your partner know what makes those feelings better and better. Good luck. Cathy

There are different strokes for different folks. What I mean is everyone is different from one another. You are most likely having small orgasms, but not experiencing the BIG O. Women experience a different type of orgasm or orgasms than men. There are methods of developing the intensity of your O. One method is developing the muscle down there. It's the same muscle that controls your urination flow. Try stopping your pee during the stream, several times while you're going. Do this every time you pee. That muscle becomes stronger and the development of that muscle will DEFINITELY assist in a more intense orgasm. Because you're not "MOANING" means absolutely NOTHING.

Hope this helps!

Brian

Sounds like you had one to me. There are some people who are more expressive verbally than others "moaning", but not to worry, you will be fine.

When I first married I didn't have an orgasm at first. I also wasn't sure if I ever was having one, but I did know when I had one for the first time. It was a few months after marriage and a lot of work on my husband's part that I finally had an orgasium. My pelivc and pubic area went wild, almost uncontrollable, so it was beyond just pleasure, which is probably what you have been experiencing. About making noises or moans there are times when I do and times when I don't. It just depends on that orgasm. They are each different. There have also been times that the orgasm was so deep that I laughed uncontrollably after it was over and then cried uncontrollable. Keep trying it as it will come. Good luck.