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-   -   How can I get my fiance' to get a job? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=582235)

  • Jun 16, 2011, 09:18 AM
    Christine10604
    How can I get my fiance' to get a job?
    My fiancé and I have been together for over a year now, and the whole time he has never had steady employment. In the beginning I didn't mind so much because he was always actively looking for something, or at least I thought he was. My mom moved out here, and bought a house to live with us, and she says if he doesn't get a job, she will kick him out. I always used to fight her about it, and make excuses, but now I am at the point where I can't make excuses for him anymore. I love him so much, but I can't support us anymore. How do I tell him I need him to actually get a job, not just say he is looking for a job?
  • Jun 16, 2011, 09:20 AM
    excon
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Christine10604 View Post
    How do I tell him I need him to actually get a job, not just say he is looking for a job?

    Hello C:

    Tell him no job - no nookie.

    excon
  • Jun 16, 2011, 09:40 AM
    adviceishere

    You sound almost afraid to tell him to get a job! Put your foot down woman! Why on earth are you putting yourself through all the hard work when he gets to just mooch off everything you earn? Don't let anyone treat you like this. OK you say you love him but he is no man if he thinks it OK to have his lady support him. Shame on him.
  • Jun 16, 2011, 09:43 AM
    mmresd
    You need to stop being his mother and start being his partner. Not that is wrong for a female to help her significant other for a little while until he gets back on his feet, but as you are feeling... enough is enough. Tell him that either he gets a job in the next "x" days (weeks) or that you will be the one kicking him out of the house. It is ultimatum time and don't hesitate to let him go if he doesn't comply, be strong. What is the point of being with someone like that anyway, a relationship is a partnership in which both must help each other. It is not fair for you to be breaking your back working while he sits at home scratching his balls on your mother's couch!

    Good Luck,
    Javi
  • Jun 16, 2011, 04:57 PM
    talaniman

    Tell him to get the hell out so you can get a real man! NOW!!
  • Jun 16, 2011, 06:39 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Ask him to make a list each day where he applies, if you have a day off, go with him, Is he wearing clothes each day to look for work ?

    But yes, tell him to get out and get a job or just get out.
  • Jun 17, 2011, 05:05 PM
    mmresd
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    I think she has hold his hand more than long enough...

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