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-   -   Rights of an absent father after 11 years (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=582224)

  • Jun 16, 2011, 08:19 AM
    Kskiver
    Rights of an absent father after 11 years
    My daughter is seventeen years old. The last time my daughter had contract with her father was December 1999. It was sporadic the two previous years. We received a letter from him January 2000, stating he was "canceling his visitation for an indefinite period." Last Friday we received a letter from an attorney stating he wants to start his weekend visitation. She has not seen or had contact with him in the last 11 years. At this time she has stated to me that she will see him if and when she wants to see him (on her on time).

    Can the court make her see him when she doesn't want to?
  • Jun 16, 2011, 11:49 AM
    JudyKayTee

    What State?

    I am not aware of any Court that will force a 17 year old to visit with a man she hasn't seen in 11 years.

    I would, however, have your Attorney respond to his Attorney. I would stay out of it.

    Why doesn't she want to at least meet with him, if for no other reason than to end the entire visitation "problem" once and for all? I understand she's been rejected for 11 years, of course. I do understand her thinking.

    Looking at the other side of things - did something happen in his life and so he walked away?
  • Jun 16, 2011, 12:17 PM
    Kskiver
    Comment on JudyKayTee's post
    We have discussed the matter of visitation and she knows this is her decision. I have not spoken to him in 15 years and do not intend to start now.

    I am assuming some of the reason she is hesitant to meet him is... she has seen him at a distance at school activities and he did not bother to speak to her turned his head instead. When she was younger she had to have some medical tests at the hospital. When we stepped out of radiology, we ran right into him. He looked down and kept walking (did not acknowledge her). She asked me if that was him, I said yes Baby. She said oh, and kept walking in the other direction. She played basketball, and he would go to the games and cheer for other kids and not her. She would be ready for him to pick her up and he would not show up. When she did go for visitation he would leave her with other people. These are just a few things.

    The only thing that I know of that happened in his life 12 years ago, was that he remarried.
  • Jun 16, 2011, 12:19 PM
    JudyKayTee

    Well, a second wife and possible other children will do that - unfortunately.

    I'd have your Attorney contact his Attorney and "tell it like it is." He may or may not try to drag the matter into Court. If he does, she WILL have a say, although the decision will not be hers.

    I hurt for your daughter.
  • Jun 16, 2011, 07:08 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    This is the issue, I will assume there is still a visitation order though the court, unless you went to have it changed.
    So that old court order is still in effect.

    He can if you don't provide the child for visits take you back to court for contempt.

    Now what will the court do,? Who knows, will the judge be liberal or not, will the judge believe in large fathers rights?

    You can wait and see if he takes you to court about this, or you can take him to court to ask for visits to be changed.

    It is doubtful they would force her, but they could order you to send her.

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