Hi,

I'm 42 years old with 3 older teenage kids and divorced 4 years ago. I always used to be a bit of a party animal and really went for it after leaving my abusive husband; I was out every weekend and made the most of every social invitation. Then I met my new partner and we have been happily together for just under 2 years now. Over the past year or so, I have changed into this person who is homeloving, quiet, happy to stay in and even unhappy to socialise! For example, a group of the girls from work (all younger than me) were arranging a lunch date and I was happily going along with it when I suddenly thought 'I really don't want to go and make the small talk as I feel I have nothing in common with them'. A year ago I would have jumped at the chance to go for lunch with the girls but I simply cannot be bothered to socialise for the sake of it. When talking to many people I find them narrow minded and uninteresting, even though I try to make the effort. I'm not like this with all people, I do enjoy certain people's company but I feel sometimes that I have become too fussy about who I enjoy spending my time with and often make excuses not to attend social events unless its family.

My question is ; what has happened to me? Has anyone else gone through this kind of transition from party animal to almost reclusive? Is it normal?
Many thanks for anyone who reads and answers !

I don't know if you're too fussy. I very often find I just have limited time, not enough time for all I would like to do, and so I turn down invitations. I've never been big on lunch with the "girls," anyway, but I am a social animal.

My husband and I enjoy our time together (I'm sure it's the same with your partner) and if I can spend time with him or small talk with people I really have little in common with, I prefer to be with him.

Maybe it's part of maturing - ?

(I do enjoy people, their thinking, my quirks, their quirks, but going out for the sake of going out no longer appeals to me.)

I like to think I'm in a comfortable place in my life with nothing to prove.

Ok so basically you just kind of got detached from the world. There's nothing wrong with that. And its completely normal. Other people do go through that transition but not everybody. See its just that times change and because you're getting older so is your personality . SO you are fine!