Me and my boyfriend have been together for 5 1/2 years and we have one child together and we hardly ever have sex. I know that after so long people get comfortable and sex slows down. We used to have sex all the time at least two to three times a week. I meen I'm only 22 and he's 24, we are still young so what's the problem?? We have had some rough patches, but I don't know if that has anything to do with it. I find myself begging for it and its embarrassing. It makes me feal not wanted and that he's not attracted to me anymore. I have told him how he makes me feal and he says he is attracted to me but it still does no good. It's usually about a month in-between each time, sometimes two and half weeks and I'm always the one pursuing it. He used to always be the one wanting to have sex, so what happened? I don't know what else to do.

Have you tried asking him whether he knows why he doesn't want sex very often, how he feels about it, if there is anything he has a problem with, what if anything he would like to change?

Good communication between partners can prevent many situations from becoming major problems and even reason to split up.

Talk about what is problematic to you about your partner , with your partner.
Too often it only gets discussed with girlfriends , mothers , and the guy she is soon to be cheating on her husband with.

Take it to the source and get the firsthand word from your partner , or give them the firsthand information about what may be wrong, then find the methodology to fix it by agreement, compromise and being more aware of each other and each others dreams, hopes and fears.

Take on the problems as a team instead of individuals with agendas that favor their point of view.
Compromise ,and keep an open mind ,don't just hear what is being said , listen to what they are saying.

I would suggest a physical just to eliminate a long list of possible physical causes for loss/lack of libido.
If nothing is wrong then you have eliminated scores of possibilities and can be that much closer to an answer hopefully.

And I am a great fan of counselling and other professionals being consulted.
I will attest to the value of counselling.

If he balks or refuses...
you can stress the importance of it by telling him the truth. Without it your chances of seeing this through are diminished

Sometimes I have ask him why he doesn't and he says that he does want to but we still won't have sex.

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Originally Posted by kaylabenn22

Sometimes I have ask him why he doesn't and he says that he does want to but we still won't have sex.

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That is not communicating. At least to any extent that could help.

Ask if something is bothering him and may be affecting his ability or desire.

Tell him you feel neglected and it is a painful thing when it comes from the person who is suppose to love you more than anyone.
Remind him if you didn't care about him and love him you wouldn't even bother to try and talk about it.
It is because of what you share that you want to get this understood and the problems out of the way.

And communicating is the way to start , work on it, and finish it.

Good communication brings better understanding of each other and makes it much easier to deal with your inevitable problems and disagreements , and will make your whole life together easier and improved.

It is worth every awkward and embarrassing moment that can happen while you work on how best to talk to each other about it.

Most things worth having are not easy to get and require work and cooperation .
Good communication is no exception, it requires some effort.

My man after five years together doesn't want to have sex with me anymore and I think he is having sex with someone else, period.

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Originally Posted by stephaniepyburn

my man after five years together does'nt want to have sex with me anymore and i think he is having sex with someone else, period.

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IF you want help with your issue please post it as a new question instead of hijacking this thread.