Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   My mum controls my life she wants to be there 90% of the time when I see my friend (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=577360)

  • May 20, 2011, 05:17 PM
    sweetwoman23
    My mum controls my life she wants to be there 90% of the time when I see my friend
    When I have social plans with my friend my mum goes all huffy and awkward she makes me feel like I should revolve my social life around her e.g if she want to go out to pubs we should always want toand if we don't , as we want to do something else she will go huffy like a kid and say horrible things. She sees other men behing my dads back when she wishes and she doesn't think twice about what I want to do on a weekend so she goes to hotels for sex with them and does what she wants when she wants, I never kick up a fuss but yet whenever I am doing something else she takes offence. I feel like she controls me , she critisces me just because I haven't found anyone special re my love life , but this coming from a woman who has 28 yr marriage with no sex or passion and she chooses to see other men, it's a marriage just for convenience as she can't bear a life alone with bills to pay (my dad pays them all) he once wanted to divorce her and she refused to sign the papers. So who is she to give me love life advice when her marriage is a sham!
  • May 20, 2011, 07:24 PM
    talaniman

    I get you are mad at your mom, but how old are you, and are you old enough to live on your own?
  • May 21, 2011, 01:23 AM
    amicon

    Please come back with some more information-also,as you mention pubs-are you in the UK?

    She can't refuse your father a divorce,should he want one-he does need to speak to a solicitor though.
  • May 31, 2011, 05:30 PM
    margie4697
    Hey girl!
    Move away from her!
    As long as you are this close to her she will control you.

    In your user name it indicates you are 23... way past time to be on your own..

    Good luck!
  • Jun 11, 2011, 06:08 AM
    sweetwoman23
    I do live in the UK. She throws tantrums when I say no, throws objects around house constantly and swears , curses me with talk of voodoo dolls, in recent weeks on a sat she lifted her skirt and revealed not wearing undies as she claims that I think every time she's going out its for sex! I was appalled by this. Last week she went into towm with my brother who has a speech problem for a drink after another moody, fed up day whilst I was at work she was distressed me when I came in from work started moaning and threw dinner across room, then said did not want to go with my brother so lets him down and I was put into situation where had to go with him and then I wait at bus stop with my brother she follows minutes later and insults me calls me a ***** and waits until bus comes then tells me to go home and she goes off into town with him. I go home stressed and annoywed with her attitude I tell my dad who comes in later on he isn't surprised by what I say has gone on from her behaviour in prev years. Throws it back at me about son she lost when only 19/20 claims that I should've died instead and so on. I feel that she brings shame everywhere she goes as she is dangerous and losing grip of everything but she is so unaware if how much! I would move out if I could raise enough cash to rent as I do no need all this nonsense. I feel that she doesn't behave how a mother should.
  • Jun 11, 2011, 07:14 AM
    amicon

    It sounds as if your mother's seriously disturbed.

    Can you move into a flatshare?
  • Jun 11, 2011, 07:43 AM
    sweetwoman23
    Comment on amicon's post
    I only work 12 hrs a week and even a flatshare wouldn't work financially as I have financial issues until find full time work.
  • Jun 11, 2011, 08:07 AM
    talaniman

    You need other things to do, both for finances that make you independent, and for a social life that makes you happy.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:34 AM.