Hey,

I'm completely conflicted at the moment. I thought I found the perfect boyfriend but I recently found out three days into us dating before he went home he was telling some girl he was having doubts about their relationship although they weren't boyfriend girlfriend he loved her and he would marry her if he could. I noticed in September he sent her a list of reasons he loved her 7 of the 10 reasons being the same. Next I find out he was married until January 2008 (for two years) and is in the midst of having papers signed and so on. I don't know whether I should believe what he says to me as in his expression of feelings.. we've been together for 4.5 months, he's planning on taking me on a trip in June (buying tickets this weekend) and bringing me to Europe. Has also asked me to move in to his new house when it's all said and done next January. It's constantly on my mind and stressing me out I don't know how to react to this. Any insight would be fantastic. Thank you!

How have you found all this out?

Did he tell you?

This seems very confusing, I would ask him what the h**l's going on-and I'd think twice about seeing him in the future.

I think these are all warning signs and you should be very careful! Not telling you that he was married and in the process of signing divorce papers is a big NO NO!These are things that you do not hide!If I were you I would confront him and definitely think twice about seeing him again!

Goodluck and take care!

Unfortunately I went through his email Once and found it out. I can't say I did that and confront him I'd look crazy.

Sorry,but this isn't much of a relationship is it,you snoop,he's probably lying and hiding things from you.

If you can't communicate honestly,you don't have a relationship.

He lied and disrespected you, and you betrayed his privacy and disrespected him. Seems like love is faulty from both of you, take the initiative and end the relationship before you completely fishing eating yourself inside out. Or tall it over with him and see what is going on.

Good luck,
Javi

Is this the drunk Army guy who can't tell time?? Hardly perfect by what you have written in THIS post, and you have enough evidence to get a better partner.

Boot him before its too late, and you really get hurt. Besides, haven't you had enough of his crap yet??

The long and short of it is, you do not know him. He keeps himself to himself, and you have only confirmed some of what you thought by reading his email. I don't think that's a sign of faith and truthfulness either, but, it is what it is.

You now know that there is enough about this man, that he has a LOT of baggage with other women in his life. Until he settles all that needs to be done (legally and otherwise), he is NOT a free man. You are 'in the present' with this man, but he is obviously in the past, not able to be involved with another woman fully, or honestly. He is not free to commit to you. And until he is, you are a pleasant person to have around- at arm's length.

Please don't accept tickets, trips, and/or any promises from this man. Where is your dignity! Until he is free, honest, and available, I would tell him to take a hike, and be grateful you've only invested a few months of your life with this man.