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-   -   He says he isn't ready for a relationship (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=571690)

  • Apr 20, 2011, 01:07 PM
    DanniiRobinson
    he says he isn't ready for a relationship
    I really need advice, I was going out with my now ex boyfriend for 5 months but I've know him a bit longer than that, it was amazing at first he was really affectionate and seemed really keen to be with me 2 months in the relationship he randomly told me he doesn't think we will last in our relationship past summer because hell have work and college so he won't get to see me as much... so I ended up really hurt and in tears so we agreed to at least try... when were together its always good he relaxes and just takes things as they are... im not the type of girlfriend that tries to change people I just accept him as he is and I don't pester his all the time so he can't really think I'm clingy. A month or two later I noticed he was getting distant with me and I was beginning to feel tense about it so I confronted him and said I'm getting a bit paranoid why you getting distant... he said he's not he's just got stuff on his mind and I'm not to worry everything fine he still like me and like to be with me... the following week I went to stay at his and the whole day he just played WoW... so I was kind of annoyed but didn't say, then in the morning we went to see his gran for the first time, she loved me! And was trying to make me shy asking if I loved my boyfriend I juts said sometimes so she would leave me alone kind of thing... later on I told him I did love him but not to worry nothing extreme I just like being with him were good together... 5 days later I received at text saying I've been thinking for a long time,I'm not ready for a relationship we should be friends... I was so taken back I didn't expect it he assured me it was all fine and now this so I started to cry and practically did the whole girly what did I do don't go please act... but he just said its over. However I don't want it to end like that or at all not just yet... my mother thinks its because he's immature but he wasn't like that before... its been 3 days and I have deleted him off everything so he doesn't see how sad I am about it... I just don't want it to be over... I keep thinking maybe if I just give him space for a couple of weeks he'll realise and come back... what's your views ill take any advice you have please?
  • Apr 20, 2011, 02:29 PM
    mmresd
    First of all what you want doesn't matter. It takes two to be in a relationship, but it only takes one to break it up. Then, if he plays WoW, I'm telling you right now that if you want to get along with him in the future you are going to have to learn how to sacrifice your space for his game time. He told you is over, accept it and start healing, distract yourself with whatever you can and if he comes back you will have a choice, but most likely he won't, so start looking forward for other opportunities.

    Good luck,
    Javi
  • Apr 20, 2011, 04:54 PM
    talaniman

    You had your fun but like he said before, he will have other things to occupy his time, and you won't be a priority.

    Sorry, but you had to see this coming, and should have been prepared but don't blame yourself for anything. You had fun while it lasted, but the party with him is over.

    It happens when you are having fun, and don't want it to stop. But it does. Rest up for the next party is what you do now.
  • Apr 20, 2011, 11:27 PM
    ajwain
    He has already announced that it is over.. so there is nothing more you can do.just think of it as a beautiful dream and move on.. the earlier the better. All the best
  • Apr 21, 2011, 01:34 AM
    amicon

    Don't hang around waiting for anyone to change their mind.

    It's over,now concentrate on building a happy life for yourself.

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