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-   -   Should I ask if she still loves me? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=57128)

  • Jan 24, 2007, 12:31 PM
    Wonder1984
    Should I ask if she still loves me?
    Hey all!

    Okay I am having a real problem...
    As some of you know me and my girlfriend broke up about half a year ago when I moved away from my hometoen to go study.

    She said that she did not want us to stay together because of the distance but I really don't believe that.
    How can you feel that after just two weeks?
    I mean we have been away from each other longer than that before...

    What I think is that she got scared of me lieaving her.
    You know... she is in our old, boring town with the same old friends and she just wants to get out of there... and I am here studying and having a blast and meeting A lot of new people (girls)...
    And there for I think she said to her self that she ended it to not get as hurt as if I would have left her for someone else.

    Only now half a year has gone as I said.
    And I really can't get ove rher.
    Ever since we broke up I have been writing a poem per week about it.
    Never ever thought I would write poems...
    I think about her all the time...

    I know it seems like I am needy but I am not.
    I just love her..
    I have delted her number from my phone, from MSN and I ahvent talked to her for the loongest time. Don't know how long even...

    So now I am wondering about asking her if she wants to get back together since she is moving a hell of a lot closer to me now. She is just finishing higschool and is going to college just 30 minutes away from mine...
    With is like 15 times shorter than it was before.
    I could even live in her town if she wanted...


    But this is her last year in high school...
    I mean maybe she wants to live it out.
    Have fun and have sex with a bunch of guys...
    Maybe she feels that she wants me but just wants to have fun for a while...



    Now I can tell here that I can't find anyone like her and that I really want her back.
    And since she is moving so close it shouldt be a problem.
    I love her.
    She loves me.
    It shouldn't be that hard to work it out...


    So now I am asking you...
    Should I do it?
    Should I ask her now or during the summer when we are in the same place?

    I love her more than anything else...
    I would kill myself after such regret if I don't do it...
    I was talking to a girl I met over her.
    And she called me the most stupid guy she ever met.
    How could I leave her?
    How could I not tell her that I love her when I was pretty sure that she still loves me?
    She deffinatley thought I should tell her...
    But I want my chance to be as big as possible...
  • Jan 24, 2007, 01:33 PM
    Trucker Girl
    Wonder1984,
    Seeing as you have posted this in September of last year, I hope you decided to pursue a relationship with your ex-girlfriend. At least ask her for a second chance at something you hold so dearly in your heart. It is clear that you cherish her, so before I go on, just give me an update on what has happened since September so we can go from there. I am 35 years old and have a wealth of experience when it comes to relationships--the good and the bad.

    Hope to hear from you soon,
    Trucker Girl
  • Jan 24, 2007, 02:16 PM
    Wonder1984
    Hehe thanks Trucker Girl
    But I think you've got this wrong...

    I posted it today jan 24 2007 but I JOINED September last year :P
    Cute ;)

    So that is the update :P
  • Jan 24, 2007, 04:31 PM
    chuff
    My advice to you is to wait until she moves closer to you. Then send her an email asking if she wants to hang out sometime. If she doesn't answer let it go. If she does then go hang out and have fun. DON'T say anything about loving her. DON'T say anything about a relationship. Just let it slowly build up. If she's into you she'll keep coming back. If she wanted out because of other reasons besides distance you will have your answer.

    PS. No woman is worth killing yourself over. Not one. I'm assuming that was a phrase of speech but if not you need a therapist. Just thought I'd throw that in just in case.
  • Jan 24, 2007, 04:44 PM
    Wonder1984
    Hehe :)
    Everyone here is so full of love and care! :)

    LOVE all you guys! :)
    Yea it was just a saying :P
    Although I don't know how many years it will take for me to be able to love again... if this does not work out.

    So back to topic... :P
    Acctually I have had a few opinions about this from friends and others...
    You are the very first to say to ask her later... (in September it would be)
    I like that because I have had so many people say to me that I should throw myself at her because then it will just seem like she is alla I want EVER and all I care for.
    But I really do have a life :P And I don't want her to see me as a needy boy who just thinks about her instaed of my own life...

    But still I am afraid that she will find someone in her new town (most beautiful woman I have seen so it won't be hard for her) before I can pull her back... And if I wait that long it will be a year after our break up... Would she think I had moved on?
  • Jan 24, 2007, 05:21 PM
    Trucker Girl
    Sorry for the confusion... I think you know her better than anyone so if you decide to wait, then you take a risk of losing her. On the other hand, if you just ask her if she wants to meet you on a weekend to just hang out or go to the movies, it will give you a chance to feel out the relationship aspect of it better. Valentine's Day is coming up, so why don't you plan a little something with her that day? Just let her know that there is no pressure or push towards commitment--you just want to pamper her for the day. There are a lot of different things you can do. This is only a suggestion. But I don't think life should be full of regrets and I think you will regret this one. Good luck and keep us updated.
  • Jan 24, 2007, 10:05 PM
    Nohitter410
    Just have trust man... and faith things will work out

    She hasn't moved to the new place yet and you don't even know what she is thinking
    She obviously is going to college near you and maybe for a reason. Let her come back to you. She needs to enjoy her last year of high school fully and things will work out but yes you do need to tell her how you feel but do it at the right time. Trying too soon will only make things worse and put you in some big problems. Listen to that previous advice, he hit it right on the head. I think Valentines day would be too much. I would wait longer. She has spring break and you said it yourself you have a life. When it gets close to graduation, maybe call her and talk about that and let her know you still care.
  • Jan 25, 2007, 07:48 AM
    Wonder1984
    Yea so you think I should wait until like mittle of the summer..
    Maybe bump into her and let it go on from there...
  • Jan 28, 2007, 02:08 AM
    Wonder1984
    Rigth?
  • Jan 28, 2007, 08:44 AM
    talaniman
    Quote:

    Okay I am having a real problem...
    As some of you know me and my girlfriend broke up about half a year ago when I moved away from my hometoen to go study.
    Instead of speculating give this girl a call to see what's up and if she cusses you out leave her alone, chances are she has a life without you so find out from the source.

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