Hi! I am 21 months with my boyfriend... The first months we were together, one guy that I liked him years ago, sent me some messages.. I answered to him and then he was sending me everyday. He knew that I had a boyfriend. One day he asked me if I was still in love with him. I said that I love my boyfriend and I didn't want to send me anymore.

But my boyfriend knew that I was messaging to him. He never told that to me.. After one year the guy sent me a message telling me that he wanted sth to tell me. I went to the café he was but he didn't tell me anything. At night he wanted to come at my home. I didn't want that. I was so scared. What the hell did he want?? He came under from my balcony but I didn't let him come up. He came finally. He climbed (!) my balcony! Hell. So he came in and stayed (it was 3a.m). I was scared. But he was just sitting. Some time he asked if I had a porn movie to see. I understood that he wanted to f*** this night and I kicked him immediately. And he told me: you dissapointed me.

I don't mind. But all night I couldn't sleep. I was thinking my boyfriend and why I left the guy come on. Why I didn't call the police? I had so many remorses.. If I shout my father he wouldn't believe that he came alone. I was afraid.. The other day I send him a message at Facebook tell him sorry. (SORRY FOR WHAT? THAT I DIDN'T LEFT HIM **** ME? OH JESUS!) I can't understand now why I sent that message!!

I am so stupid! So I can't explain that to my boyfriend now! I didn't want to talk to this guy again... He saw me when I was out one day and he called me "Hey" but I didn't even come back to answer. I told to my boyfriend that he was annoying me. So my boyfriend went to the guy and tolg him not to annoy me again.. The guy told him what happened and showed him the message at Facebook. But he said that he was like to f*** me that night. That he kissed me. It isn't true.

My boy believed him and he doesn't trust me now. 8 months later he wants a good reason that I did these things... But I don't know why! He can't trust me now... And I want to make him trust me. To show that I am never going to do those things!! To show that I have changed and never tell him lies!! Please someone help me... Please...

Stop acting guilty, as you made your mistake(s), and apologized. If he chooses to believe a stranger and not forgive you, then that's his problem, especially after 8 freakin' months to let this go?!

You don't have to take your boyfriends crap either!!

If he can't trust you because he chooses to believe somebody else's word over yours,should you really be with him?

I wouldn't.

Your boyfriend only has one side of what happened, tell him what happened, all of it.

You made a mistake, we all make mistakes but as long as you learn from it it won't happen again.

I want to be with him.. I love him.. And he loves me.. But he can't trust me..

He is still thinking that I am lyinhg to him.. No! I have changed! He said that he want from me to tell him sth to do in our relationship for not to break up... I don't know what to do to make him trust me...

You can't make him trust you. Either he gets over himself, or he doesn't. You can give him all your passwords and let him look through your phone, and let him snoop to his hearts content, but that will only feed the mistrust, and make things worse, so short of putting on a dog collar, and handing him the leash, its him that has to learn to cope with his own feelings, or he will never get over his fears, ever.

He has all my passwords..

I told him all these things.. But he can't trust me..

Then its no longer YOUR problem, but HIS! You better tell him to handle his own issues, or he will continue to put his responsibility, on YOU.

Just like you ask here what should you be doing, or what you could do, ASK HIM THAT QUESTION!

You may be surprised, and shocked at his answer. And even you have to see the big red flag waving in a partner that can't forgive you for a mistake you made after 8 freakin months!!!!!!!

I asked him and he aswered: I have told you.. But nothing.. Now you will think and if you can find sth you would want to be together.. Either don't do it...

The big COME BACK!! We were OK and now AGAIN he asks me these things... He promised that he would never remind me of these things... But he did... Oh jesus I told that I don't want to speak for these things.. And he told me that I leave him alone in this moment.. :(

I suggest you leave him alone for good-save yourself future drama and end it.

OK.. that's what I am doing..

Good luck.