Me and my girlfriend have been dating for about 2months now and she always wants to come over and see me, says she misses me and wants cuddles and loves massages and stuff but as soon as the massage or tickles start to lead into sex she rolls over or says she is too tired. When we first met the sex was wild and crazy and we had sex for about 1hour or longer and was amazing for the first 2 times... then she said she is on her period and can't have sex otherwise it will be messy and I'm like I don't care... so we put down a towel on the bed and it wasn't even messy. Problem is... she never wants to have sex anymore and when we do have sex it only usually lasts for 10-20minutes max not like 30-45-1hour like it should... otherwise what's the point right... I usually can go for about 45minutes to an hour and most girls complain when guys can't go for longer then 2minutes... I don't understand. I am always horny like most guys are and when I get to see my baby girl I want to make love to her and have sex... there is only so much kissing and cuddling you can do... and what else ? She always says to me are you done yet... its starting to hurt. Or that when we first have sex have to put on a lot of lube because its hard to get it in there and she usually won't let me put it in. she wants to put it in and go slow for the first few minutes because it hurts too much... do you think she is a virgin. I mean we had sex twice now so she isn't anymore if I'm her first but she is 21 and she is like a size 6/8. I'm starting to think maybe there is something wrong with me. Or her... I'm not sure which one... this is starting to do my head in. I tried really hard the next time we had sex to *** within 20minutes and she was happy that I *** before she did. Or before it hurt... but the thing is... I Don't HAVE SEX TO JUST PLEASE MYSELF. I DO THE SEX TO GET HER WET AND MAKE HER *** OR ORGASM and get her off. I don't care I can just have a wank and get myself anytime... suppose she can too. But its hard for me to ask and explain this on a forum that won't have a diss or hate or maybe laugh about it because its serious to me and I am looking for answers... most girls complain when guys are too short don't they?? What do you think the problem is here. I look in the mirror and think I have a nice body and I'm attractive looking guy who has a lot going for him and she says she always want to see me be with me and misses me... she bought all this sexy stuff from a sex party like uniforms and toys and crap but never uses them?? I'm running out of ideas and as much as I just want to have sex with someone else right now because of this. I wouldn't do that to her because I love her too much and never want to cheat on her but you can understand how I feel right?? Please help and give me answers... thank you community :)

Before we can address this can you please tell us your age, due to the rules on giving out advice on the adult sexuality forum.

I'm 25 and it got worse last night, she didn't *** at all and I think I'm not pleasing her or something because she doesn't want to have sex again... I tried this morning and she goes get your hand away from there, and I rolled over and got funny or crankie and she goes sorry baby I don't do morning sex, she also does let me go down on her or like anal. I'm starting to get over this ayyy

I hope someone can help because I'm so close to just rooting some other girls that actually get off on me ****ing them... its ****ing with my head and making me more depressed then I already am... I want all guys to have input on this if they are going through the same thing what they do and stuff. I'm so upset and angry and don't know what to do

Tell us your age. It's against the rules to give sexual advise to anyone under 18.

25 - 20/02/1986

Have you tried talking to her? Not whilst trying to have sex but at a different time. Maybe she is scared of getting pregnant. Maybe she feels that all you want to do is have sex. We could keep guessing till the cows come home but the only person who knows how she feels is her. If you are in a relationship with her you need to find out too.

If she is complaining it goes on too long maybe she isn't really aroused. This can be as much about what is going on in her head as about what is going on in the bedroom.

Take the emphasis off what you expect to be happening and start finding out what actually makes her tick, how she feels.

This is going to be blunt.

How old is she? How long have you known her? How often do you see each other? How much time do you usually spend together? How much of that time is spent trying to get sex?

You have been dating for TWO months and you are already thinking about playing around on her.

Have the two of you thought about getting to know each other when you aren't fooling around?

You do realize that many women do not orgasm from penetration alone, don't you? If you are making sex about getting her off, then maybe you should ask her about works for her (hopefully, she knows). While you may be able to 'last', it doesn't mean you are paying attention to what she needs or how she needs it.

To be honest, this sounds like more about what you want than about trying to discover what she needs. Communicate with her when you aren't in the bedroom or wanting sex.

Remember that life outside the bedroom affects what happens inside it. If she is stressed out and exhausted from work, school, family, friends, relationship issues, etc. then she may not feel like having sex. Intimacy is more than putting genitalia together or cuddling with the expectation of putting genitalia together.

You sound like the kind of guy she should kick to the curb.

2 MONTHS, and you're freaking out about sex? Sorry, honey, you don't seem to have a CLUE what works for women. You have to get into her HEAD before you can get into her PANTS.

I bet your idea of foreplay is cuddling, kissing and stroking her naughty bits. That's just being PUSHY, that's not FOREPLAY. How often do you go out and do fun things? How often do you flirt with NO expectation of sex?

I'm having a hard time believing that you're 25, actually. Your attitude about sex is closer to that of a 15 year old. You're not getting sex so you're going to leave or cheat? Gee, that's REAL mature. Since when does she OWE you sex for just being with her?

Try DATES. Try TALKING to her. Try LISTENING to her (that's a big one). Try laying off on the pressure to have sex--period.

Frankly, I wouldn't have sex with you either. How long you last doesn't mean a thing, honestly---because while penetration feels NICE, it's not going to get most women off. It's akin to having her rub your balls for 45 minutes---hard enough to chafe them. Would you want to just jump right back into sex when the time spent on it HURTS?

You are, quite frankly, not turning her on. And I think that it's YOUR fault, not hers. I think you're focusing on sex so much that she thinks the only things you care about are her vagina, her mouth, and her breasts.

Ill kick you to the curb. You don't know me so why hater maggot

d3fected, thank you for returning after several months. By your response I take it that you do not care for our answers.

Are you still with her?

Have you managed to figure out what the issues were/are?

Are you more sensitive to her needs than your previous posts seem to indicate?

Honestly, just sad dude. What about me, I've been in a relationship for 4 years, girlfriend is afraid of sex. Most likely, we never will, she's so badly damaged. Imagine how depressing that is for me.

I do the same thing your girlfriend does. I love my boyfriend more than anyone else in this world, but I rarely want to have sex and always I always say it hurts, which it really actually does hurt. Personally, I think it is all in my head because if I think I want to have sex then I am OK and I like it, sometimes. That does not always work. Also, I am on adderall and that does not help my situation, so maybe she is prescribed to a medicine that causes low sex drive. Trust me it hurts my feelings and sometimes I cry knowing I am not pleasing my boyfriend, so it is most likely hurting her feelings too, she is just not telling you. Another idea is to have her do kegel exercises. For some strange reason it works a lot.

Thank you mnk660 for helping me understand much better. My girlfriend has a similar sort of situation as you. I feel bad for saying what I said, but to be honest that's how I feel and I needed to express it.

Did some research into what you've said, NOT sure if she would do anything like that.

Tell me your age, we are on the internet if your 9 years old lie to me tell me your 18 it's the rules

He posted his age 9 months ago in post #3. Please read the ENTIRE question and watch dates before responding.