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Well I am 15 years old ! And my boyfriend is 18 ! We have been together for awhile now ! But my parents only knew about it for about 3 months, he is getting a house and wants me to move in! And I want to move in with him, because I hate it at home ! My mom hits me in the head sometimes ! I always get *****ed at and I hate it! ADVICE PLEASE!
It sounds to me like you have two issues. The first one is whether you should move in with your boyfriend. The answer, plain and simple, is "No!" Neither one of you are ready for that. Remember, your situation at home is not a reason to make a poor decision.
Your second issue is your home situation. If your parents hit you in the head, etc. then you need to find help with that. Is there any adult in your life that you can talk to about that? Perhaps a friend's parents, a teacher, guidance counsellor, your minister from church, another relative, etc? You really need someone to help you deal with that. If you don't have anyone then look up Children's Services in your area and give them a call.
You want to be mature, self-sufficient and have resolved your home issues prior to taking such a drastic step as living with a boyfriend. You have lots of alternatives, please use them.
Hugs, Didi
I know ! My boyfriend works, pays bills, and has a house ! I don't want to live at home anymore, I don't like to talk about my feelings ! And my mom and dad and brother don't listen to me at all ! I just want to try living with my boyfriend ! I think it would help me and my parents relationship
What's your birthdate?Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaaaye69
How long is that?Quote:
we have been together for awhile now !
What have they said about it?Quote:
my parents only knew about it for about 3 months
A whole house? An apartment?Quote:
he is getting a house
You do realize you are putting him in harm's way, especially if you move in with him. You know that, right? Legally, he can be named as a sex offender for the rest of his life. Is that how much you love him?
Listen to Grandma DiDi. If you're being abused at home, please tell someone.
I am born march 6th, 1996... 2 1/2 years... They are allowing it now, didn't in the beginning so we hid the relationship... A whole house. I know that about the cops situation ! But I do love him and my friend is 15 and she is dating a 25 year old! That is worse.
So you just turned 15?
The school will have to know your new address and will ask you who lives there with you. If you lie or don't tell them, they will soon find out.
You're planning to have a baby soon?
How is he getting a house? Rent?
What do his parents think about your situation?
Comparing yourself to someone else who is with an older guy and saying you're not as bad is a mark of immaturity.
Yea I just turned ! I know I would have to tell them my address and I wouldn't lie ! I want a baby, but am not planning on getting pregnant any time soon ! Yea him , and his buddy are paying rent while me and his friends girlfriend live there. His parents like me and don't really say anything ! And yea I know.. I didn't mean to point the finger. But yea I know it is wrong, but I love him
Sweetie, I understand how you feel... I really do. I left home at sixteen and it was the biggest mistake I ever made. You carry it with you the rest of your life, and quite often so do your children and grandchildren after you. I really think that a girl/woman should not live with a man until she has lived on her own for several years. Ideally, you will finish school, get a job, work, save money, do some charitable work and become totally comfortable with herself prior to living with a man. Your really need to learn how to look after you before you commit to sharing/caring with someone 24/7/365. I will tell you one thing... if you don't like to talk about your feelings then your relationship will go NOWHERE!! I will also tell you straight up that your moving in with your boyfriend will do nothing to help you and your parent's relationship. You are looking at this from the heart of a 15 year old. Try to see it from the wisdom of someone who knows a heck of a lot more about life and love than that. Check out some facts on the internet. You might be shocked. Do you know how to budget? Do you know how to shop properly? Do you know how to cook? What do you plan to do about school? Will you work? If so, how will you get a job and how much experience do you have? How well do you clean house and do laundry? At 15, are all your friends in school dating boys, etc. If so, what will you have in common with them? Can you afford your own medicals costs? What do you intend to do about birth control and how would you handle it if you got pregnant? Do you live in a place where your boyfriend could be arrested for having an underage girlfriend?
What happens if your boyfriend loses his job? Can you support the two of you? Does your boyfriend really make enough to support two of you?
I know I am asking a lot of questions but those are only a small portion of what you should be asking yourself prior to making such a serious decision. Please take the time to figure out all the answers to these, and similar questions. I wish you luck, love and happiness.
Hugs, Didi
How do you plan to keep from getting pregnant? The pill, condoms, what? You need to use at least two, and really three, forms of because.
The school might turn in your boyfriend, you realize.
What kind of work does your boyfriend do? You realize he will come home from work and expect a clean house and hot food on the table, and then he'll disappear to be out with his friends, leaving you to do the dishes and his laundry. That'll get old real fast!
And like Grandma DiDi said, how are you going to afford food, medical insurance, car insurance, homeowners insurance, gas for the car, clothes, hair cuts, and all the other things people need?
Do you know how to budget? I did some classes in school about it!
Do you know how to shop properly? Yea I do, have been since 8 years old
Do you know how to cook? I always cook and bake !
What do you plan to do about school?I will always go to school till I grad
Will you work? Yea I will , and I will get a job for after school !
How well do you clean house and do laundry? I have always cleaned and done laundry, I'm a clean addict
Are all your friends in school dating boys, All my friends have boyfriends that are out of school & working
Can you afford your own medicals costs? Medical is paid for down here !
What do you intend to do about birth control & how would you handle it if you got pregnant? I am not having sex yet & neither is he !
Do you live in a place where your boyfriend could be arrested for having an underage girlfriend? No
What happens if your boyfriend loses his job? - He has more than one
Yes he can support us and yes we are both supporting.
The town I live in ! Nothing matter !
May I ask, what US state or country are you in?
You're going to have separate beds?
Who will do the cooking?
Well, I still think it's a terrible idea that you will regret one day. You have asked for advice and the advice is that you should not do it. It sounds like you will apparently do whatever you want, anyhow, so I don't know why you are asking... but if the advice matters, then it seems like "No!" is the resounding answer. If you are leaning the other way, then I hope you seriously plan, talk & think it over first.
Hugs, Didi
Yukon Canada !
I don't know about the bed situation yet lol
We will both cook
Thanks...
In order for you to move in with your boyfriend you will have to be emancipated from your parents. To do that you have to prove that you can take care of yourself. Do you have a job? Can you afford to pay for rent every month, food, bills, on your own with no help?
Even if you can, you're still only 15, and living with an 18 year old will likely land him in jail. Your boyfriend would be considered a pedophile, and if you're reported he'll be on the sex offender list for the rest of his life.
Why not wait a few years, go to school, get an education, find a good job, and then, if you two are still in love and still together, you can move in with each other when you're both legally adults.
If your parents are abusing you that's not something you have to tolerate, nor should you have to. Call CPS, they'll come to your home and investigate. If you are being abused they will step in, remove you from the home and place you somewhere safe.
Yes to all of that !
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