Our custody order syays that I am the one who makes medical and educational decisions for the child; I would like a clear definition of this. Can he sign progress reports, report cards, permission slips and so on? Does he decide what school related activities she is in (ie. Soccer, drama, cheerleading) and does the educational decisions encompass extra-curricular activities like gymnastics (he wants her in dance, she wants to be in gymnastics).

Thank you!

What it means from a legal stand point is that there must be a last word. SO when you both don't agree on a related subject then by court order you have the last word. It doesn't mean that you dictate the answers it means that in a tie your vote over rides the other.

Signing of documents isn't covered under this as you both are legal parents of the child. So either can sign a document for the child.

Extra activities are not covered under the "education" umbrella. If the child wishs one over the other (soccer vs baseball) then the parents should try to do their best to agree for the child's sake. Also some things need to be set in writing. Like if it involves continuing payments like martial arts classes or road trips to compete then you need to agree on who is paying for what.

In the end you both as parents need to get past the games and try to find common ground for the child. But I will say this. Gymnastics does involve dance so at some point it would be beneficial to take some dance clases. In the end you both need to agree on things like that and try not to allow the child to run the show. Be the parents and make the decisions as to what's best and the common goal.

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Originally Posted by califdadof3

... Signing of documents isnt covered under this as you both are legal parents of the child. So either can sign a document for the child. ...

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It seems to me that the OP clearly stated she has the right to make "medical and educational decisions". I don't know why this is, but the fact remains: that's what it says. She could inform the school, etc. of her authority and ask that they refrain from accepting decisions from the father.

On days that the child goes to his home, ( assume he has mid week visits) or at least on those weekends, a parent is often needed to sign things for the child. Singing paper work that is returned is not educational decisions, it is merely showing the paper work was returned home. So I view he is perfectly in his rights for signing progess reports and the such.

And since he is the one getting the, I have to also "assume" the child brought them on one of his visit days, or the child would have returned it to the other parent.

A educational choice is moving them to a private school, or home schooling or moving them to another public school or putting them into which class in school.

Other programs, such as after school issues are just that, and would have to be determined as to who has physical custody on those days.

IE. You can not decide that the child has baseball on saturdays if the other parent has the child on Saturday, he has no obligation to take the child to activities on his time of visit with the child. Nor can he do the same for yours.

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Originally Posted by AK lawyer

It seems to me that the OP clearly stated she has the right to make "medical and educational decisions". I don't know why this is, but the fact remains: that's what it says. She could inform the school, etc. of her authority and ask that they refrain from accepting decisions from the father.

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The way I had read it from the OP the lingering question was about signing documentation. That is removed from the decision making process so he has the right to do so. As said by Fr_Chuck he can not change things but a permission slip (like for road trip) or signing a report card aren't about decisions but about being legally responsible. It is not uncommon to have a "last word" when it comes to certain subjects in a child's life. Its written that way all the time when the parents can't seem to get along.

I appreciate all of the responses... the problem is that he refuses to co parent. He basically views everything as his decision and if I don't like it then oh well. We have split custody (she is at my house for one week and his house the next). I feel as though he only makes decisions based on what is convienent for him - he does not think about what is important to our daughter.
This latest issue is in regards to being tested for "gifted education" classes. He signed the permission slip for her to be tested and didn't even tell me about it. I am under the impression that this type of thing would fall into the educational decisions section and thus would make it my decision.

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Originally Posted by cara13xxi

I appreciate all of the responses....the problem is that he refuses to co parent. He basically views everything as his decision and if I don't like it then oh well. We have split custody (she is at my house for one week and his house the next). I feel as though he only makes decisions based on what is convienent for him - he does not think about what is important to our daughter.
This latest issue is in regards to being tested for "gifted education" classes. He signed the permission slip for her to be tested and didn't even tell me about it. I am under the impression that this type of thing would fall into the educational decisions section and thus would make it my decision.

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The true problem is the coparenting. And that is something that could be taken to court and made into a court order by way of communicating in writing. Is this a decision your against as far as her being tested? Or is it that you weren't informed ? (yes you have a right to be angry about that).

I am upset that I wasn't even consulted. I never am. We just went to court -- unfortunately we ended up with a judge that was in his last 2 weeks of presiding and was just clearing his docket -- he didn't even listen to anything. Now we have to actually get his decision drawn up and signed by the new judge -- is it possible to get this new judge to make any changes?