My wife had a affair 8 years ago and another 4 years ago , first one for 3 months and the other for 13 months but staying in contact for 3 years meeting up and phoning each other. Not I've found out through one of my kids she's been texting and phoning someone else. Now here the thing over the years I comfronted her and got no where. Since September 2010 I questioned her over everything and she admits but says grow up and get over it. Well I'm fuming but not sure what to do as we have four boys at home all teenagers and if I walk the house is gone the boys need a home and so will I, don't love my wife but then I don't hate her just hate what she has done . HELP

Have you tried counselling to find out why she has affairs and why you keep "forgiving" her?

If she won't go to counseling, go alone.

I would divorce her, and get my business affairs together, and still take care of my kids.

At least talk to a lawyer, you may have more options than you think.

As I work away its hard to get anywhere, seen my lawyer and I've waiting for my youngest to become 16 yrs old then I will not get fleeced by my wife, since 2006 I decided to just provide a good life and home for my family. Its hard and you have to knuckle down and just get on with it. I've got 4 ex friends of my wife talking to me, sometimes you wonder if there is tomany tales but one thing is on going my wife keeps friends for about 13 months then the friendship ends and it because they all say she talks about her activeties to them and they end the friendship because they don't want to listen anymore and she's a cow/***** . Am I crazy putting up with it she says she loves me it just sex and fun. To me I'm ashamed and disgusted but I have to wait 18 months else I'm letting the boys down or am I by staying bank account is always empty and I have no love for the woman but I don't hate her just hate what she has done. Am I mad I'm now suffering by having anxiety attacks and I'm going to the doctors as I have high blood pressure and anxiety I'm turning into a nervous wreck.

Get your ducks in a row, and get a plan together. Hard I know, but has to be done. Your kids will adjust, and you will be a better parent without the distractions of her foolish disrespect.

I read somewhere - and I'm sure better minds can find the info - that children would prefer to live with one parent in peace than with two parents who aren't speaking or are arguing.

Your children are old enough to know what's going on.

From the legal standpoint I don't understand how the age of your children will change whether your wife will "fleece" you. She is entitled (or not entitled) to spousal support independent of the children and their status. The custodial parent is entitled to child support - but that's hardly "fleecing" the non-custodial parent. What did your Attorney mean?

Of all the disparaging injustices betrayal is the worst to me. Any person that dishonors a relationship commits a violation of a trust and is unworthy in my opinion.

If a person cannot act honorably then they are not worth my time. I have had the same experiences Bri48 and I understand that it is complicated and involves many emotions however my experience verified my core beliefs.

I can possibly see an indiscretion that in some cases can be forgiven but if repeated then usually in the end action has to be taken. I believe that you are at this point albeit a little late.

Tal said it; do your due diligence, it is definitely past due. This is not about pride, it is about doing what is right.

Stringer