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-   -   I'm divorced can I relinquish my rights to the adopted child (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=560811)

  • Mar 9, 2011, 06:03 AM
    Bruce_Pitman
    Im divorced can I relinquish my rights to the adopted child
  • Mar 9, 2011, 06:08 AM
    excon

    Hello B:

    No. What? Do you think he was, like, a rental?? Dude!

    excon
  • Mar 9, 2011, 07:01 AM
    joypulv
    The child, as in your child? You assumed all rights and responsibilities of a parent when you adopted.
    What does the mother want? What states are involved?
  • Mar 9, 2011, 07:56 AM
    Bruce_Pitman
    The same day that the child was adopted, upon arrival my wife falsely accused me of domestic abuse in the presence of my mother and a babysitter, the officer made me leave the home. We soon filed for a divorce, she asks for child support... I didn't want kids, I agreed to the adoption from being pressured by the foster care agency to help her obtain a child. She makes a six figure salary... I'm in the middle five figures... it is very apparent that I was being used to help complete her as a woman and financially as well... I want out. It's never the child's fault for the evil that money hungry evil people. It's not fair to me as a good man and promising father for the right family setting.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:00 AM
    AK lawyer
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Bruce_Pitman View Post
    The same day that the child was adopted, upon arrival my wife falsely accused me of domestic abuse in the presence of my mother and a babysitter, the officer made me leave the home. We soon filed for a divorce, she asks for child support...I didn't want kids, I agreed to the adoption from being pressured by the foster care agency to help her obtain a child. She makes a six figure salary...I'm in the middle five figures...it is very apparant that I was being used to help complete her as a woman and financially as well...I want out. It's never the childs fault for the evil that money hungry evil people. It's not fair to me as a good man and promising father for the right family setting.

    You should have immediately taken steps to rescind the adoption. There would be a very limited window of opportunity if any at all. If you make ~ $50,000 don't tell me you couldn't afford an attorney to tell you this.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:08 AM
    Bruce_Pitman
    What I will tell you is that I had to pay an attorney $15,000 just for the divorce, my child support payment cut my salary in half because of her income being so high in MD, I need a storage unit and to find somewhere to live ASAP, so don't come off on me like you a female with men issues, I just asked for an answer to my question your opinion not needed with me.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:16 AM
    AK lawyer
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Bruce_Pitman View Post
    What I will tell you is that I had to pay an attorney $15,000 just for the divorce, my child support payment cut my salary in half because of her income being so high in MD, I need a storage unit and to find somewhere to live ASAP, so don't come off on me like you a female with men issues, I just asked for an answer to my question your opinion not needed with me.

    You answer was posted here today at 8:08. "No." So why are you continuing to whine about it?

    And if you paid an attorney $15,000, he or she should have told you what we have told you today for free.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:21 AM
    Bruce_Pitman
    Not whining it is clear you are not experienced with family law or the question... my issue is people like you that do not research your answers and just pull an answer out of your own belief when the law work contrary... Thanks anyhow.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:22 AM
    excon
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Bruce_Pitman View Post
    Im divorced can I relinquish my rights to the adopted child

    Quote:

    Bruce_Pitman does not find this helpful: The answer received was insultive and just plain dumb.
    Hello again, Bruce:

    I answered the question YOU asked. You want to throw away your kid. I took exception to that.

    If you don't know how to formulate a question, don't be surprised by the answers you get.

    Excon
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:25 AM
    Bruce_Pitman
    You are sounding real dumb I only been around this kid for two months, you keep saying my kid like he is biologically mine... the problem is you don't know how to formulate an intelligent answer.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:33 AM
    excon
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Bruce_Pitman View Post
    You are sounding real dumb I only been around this kid for two months, you keep saying my kid like he is biologically mine...the problem is you don't know how to formulate an intelligent answer.

    Hello again, Bruce:

    Let's count, shall we? You asked the following question: "Im divorced can I relinquish my rights to the adopted child?" I answered THAT question. You THEN added more information, that had you INCLUDED in your first question, might have resulted in a different answer.

    Apperently, you can't count to 2. By the way, I changed my mind. Your child would be MUCH better off without you.

    excon
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:38 AM
    southamerica

    How is it that throughout the home study mandated by the government and performed by CPS, the 3 subsequent interviews, through the application process, the lengthy selection process that the birth mother goes through, the interview with her, the agreement to care for her child as your own...

    How do you write off that process and, ergo, that child, because you're divorced and it's not "biologically" yours? I guess I was under the impression that, after the adoption process, adoptive parents didn't care about biology.

    I hope that whatever you and your ex are going through, it doesn't adversely affect the child.

    I know I'm not answering your question, but I'm a concerned outsider who sincerely hopes you make the right choices for the child. Good luck.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:38 AM
    Synnen

    Thanks for propogating the stereotype that biological kids are somehow "better" than adopted kids, and that adopted kids don't matter because they're not "blood".

    This is my OPINION (and if you give me a reddie for my OPINION, I'll make sure you are disciplined for it, as it's against the rules)--YOU should be STERILIZED.

    Once you sign adoption papers, LEGALLY you are EXACTLY the same as a biological parent. You can't just hand off your kid like it's a puppy you don't want anymore.

    You want out of child support? File for custody and get HER to pay YOU child support.

    Oh yeah---I forgot. This kid doesn't matter in the least to you. You probably treat dogs better than you treat your child. Yes, YOUR child.

    If you didn't want children, you shouldn't have signed the adoption papers.

    Congratulations, Daddy--you're EXACTLY the same amount of deadbeat dad as you would be if the child were biologically yours.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:39 AM
    joypulv
    I happen to feel for you (and I'm a woman) but you negged a reasonable response (window of opportunity to rescind adoption), so force yourself to apologize and start over with the facts that you should have provided in the first place. Timeline would be good, for one thing.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:49 AM
    Bruce_Pitman
    In response to all the negative feed-back I keep this kid 3 times a week over night and raise him as biological, without him knowing the issues with the mother and the justice system. My problem can not be helped here...

    Thanks for at least hearing me joypulv.
    All other answers were a waste of time and typing.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 08:52 AM
    Synnen

    I am always absolutely amazed at the number of people who do not give all of the information on their situation, then get mad when the answers are not accurate or what they want to hear.

    If you want an answer that can actually HELP you, then give ALL of the information.

    If you want to be frustrated by "negative responses", by all means give almost no information--and make sure the information that you DO give makes you look like a jerk.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 09:08 AM
    joypulv
    Your problem can't be helped here?
    WHY are you so determined to lose out?
    I too was aghast at your original question.
    But when your story started to sound like you might have been a pawn in her efforts to be a mother, it seemed time to listen and help.
    IF it's true that the cops called on the day the child came home was all part of a scheme to divorce you.
    Given your temper, unwillingness to communicate, and fatalism, it's going to be a struggle to keep this going.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 09:09 AM
    southamerica

    Bruce, I hope that you get what you want. For the baby's sake I hope you can "relinquish" your rights to him/her.

    I hope your ex will be a good mother.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 09:21 AM
    Curlyben
    As the OP clearly has issues with the advice received, this thread is now:

    http://mvny.org/images/closed.gif

    It really doesn't help if you give little or no information and then rant at the VOLUNTEERS that offer sincere advice to your situation.
    Manners cost nothing.
  • Mar 9, 2011, 09:27 AM
    RickJ

    Bruce: These people are here to help for free. Please don't mistake frank advice and comments for "bad" advice or comments.

    You've come to a public forum to ask for help and advice and you have been given it. Some people hear what they want to hear and some people don't.

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