My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 yrs. I was married before and have a beautiful 7 yr old from that marriage. He was married twice before and both his marriages failed because of the ex's cheating on him. My marriage failed because my ex was never home always away with his buddies on hunting and fishing trips even on the holidays. I met my boyfiriend who is a wonderful man and very loving and caring and things were great until we relocated through his job. I have missed home very much and at times have voiced it maybe too much. The problem is whenever there is a argument he shuts right down won't talk to me the door to the bedroom is closed which means do not enter so I try to give him his space. He has on several times told me that he's moving me back up to new england that I can have anything in the house that I want and I tell him no that I'm not going any where I'm staying. He tells me that he's in love with me and committed to me but if I'm in a bad mood than that's it it's over with him. Last Saturday was a mood day for me I was bummed because he was leaving through work for 2 weeks and I was feeling blue about it because he does travel a lot with his job. He was in a great mood and always seems to be when he leaves for a business trip and I pointed it out to him. Anyway we did some errads on Saturday than Saturday eve. He got mad because I said I didn't like him being away for so long and than he went in another room to watch a movie and never came to bed. I woke up around 7am and he was already gone. I called his cell phone and he was very cool and said he left at 4am. I said well drive careful and I love you no response so hung up. The only thing that I have heard from him is a e-mail that he sent me about some joke that someone sent him. He usually calls except when we have these disagreements than I hear nothing from him at all. I don't know what to do I love him deeply and he says one day how much he loves me and than the next it's like that's it it's over with him. This has happened for the 3rd time since sept. Do you think he wants out for real or should I try to make this work which I really want to do but don't know how. I know I have a lot of faults and not the easiest person to deal with at times but I always seem to be the one who is trying to make the first move when this happens and it takes a couple of days for things to start getting back on track. I want to call him but won't I feel that make make things worse if I don't give him his space. Because I'm unhappy with the relocate doesn't mean that I don't love him and that he doesn't make me happy which he thinks at times. If I didn't want the relationship to work or be with him I wouldn't have made the move and I would have left already but he says all I do is complain which at times I do but I don't think in my mind anyway anymore than anyone else complains about stuff. Any advice anyone could give me I would glady accept.

Seems to me you have several issues going on here, between previous relationships and the main one being the relocation. This is a difficult thing to give advice on as you seem to be aware of many of the problems already. One word of advice I would give you however is sit down and talk out your feelings about the relocation, tell him exactly how you are feeling, don't shout and argue as this will have a negative effect and just switch him off. Just go for a walk or sit and have a leisurely supper and tell him exactly how you feel just saying to him will help him understand and make you feel better. Women are very guilty of thinking men are mind readers getting all worked up about something and thinking they can read the signal hence they just leave the room and switch off. Get yourself some friends socialise with them, get yourself something else to focus on so that he is not coming home from work to someone who is upset the minute he walks through the door. I'm not blaming this all on you as he appears to have issues that he needs to address as in giving you the silent treatment well two can play that game which is why you have to show him your idependance by doing your own thing, so when say he calls your busy out with friends or going to a class at the gym or whatever. This is also a good way to help you settle in your new location. When he does eventually call don't sound needy just be cool and tell him how busy etc you have been not just sitting at home pining for him to return. All that said I do think you both care for each other but unfortunately you are both playing the you leave no I'll leave game. Hope this has helped.

I can certainly see why he has been married a few times before and I don't care what he says I bet his wives didn't cheat until they were fed up with his BS. That doesn't make it right but it is a red flag to YOU now as you are already doubting yourself and this relationship because of his actions. You are investing way more than he is, in making this work and sorry to say when you have had enough of his non-communication you to will leave.