Rocky Relationship! Help!
This is a long story (and rambling in some points haha), so thank you in advance for all who read it.
My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 6 months. We both go to the same college. She is my first girlfriend and means the world to me. Her past has been much different than mine, like she comes from a dysfunctional family who never support her in anything. Anyway, the first two months of our relationship were fantastic. I was being everything she wanted from a guy. However, winter came and it started to become difficult to do things outside. So, I became lazy and basically treated her more like a friend rather than a girlfriend. Instead of going on dates or me doing anything romantic, we would just sit around our dorms and things got boring.
Now, we get to the present. About a 2 weeks ago, she "reconnects" with an old friend that she hasn't seen since 6th grade. She confessed that she dated him and she has feelings for him still. She also tells me that there have been a bunch of little things that have bothered her about our relationship (which now I know what most of them are.) They have been texting each other all the time, and I really wanted to ask her to stop, but I didn't want to seem too jealous or insecure.
This week, our college is on Spring Break, which could not have come at a worse time, since she decides that she wants to take this break as a break from us to see what she truly wants. This break has opened up my eyes to all the things that I did wrong in our relationship, and I desperately want to fix them. But, she doesn't want to hear any of it right now. Every time I try to bring it up, she claims it stresses her out too much to think about it.
Unfortunately, this break which she claimed was going to be used to analyze our relationship, she has instead used to text/FB this kid non-stop and has even gone over to his house. I hate to admit it, but I got so jealous that I logged onto her FB to see what her and him have been talking about. Basically, it was her telling him how much she wants to "make out and cuddle" with him and what all they are going to do tomorrow when she goes over to his house again.
So basically, my plan was to continue NC until we got back to college and then figure out our relationship then. Because I know what I have done wrong and if I can get us back to what we had a couple months ago, she wouldn't even worry about this other kid. However now that I know what she wants to do with this other kid, I have this nagging feeling that if I can talk to her before tomorrow that maybe I could convince her not to go through with making out/cuddling with this other guy.
I am heartbroken because I still love her, and I believe that she still loves me. She has said in the past that she does love me, and that she tries to hide it the closer we get to each other. She hasn't had any long-term relationships, and we are currently to the point where we are transitioning out of the Honeymoon phase. I know this is fixable, I just don't know what to do. I mean technically we are on a break, but it still hurts to know that she would rather make out with this kid than try to fix what we had.
Again, sorry for the lengthy read, and thank you for any advice! :)