I just turn 16 in January and my mom died when I was 9. My dad started dating and I didn't care then all of a sudden when I was about to turn 15 he wanted to get married to a lady that lived in Canada. Also we lived in Florida. So without any warning they got married on Christmas and me and my brother wasn't to happy. Then my dad wanted us to move up to Canada and I didn't want to. Neither Sid my brother but without warning again we moved and now I can't stand it. My dad and his wife are fighting more. His wife thinks I am going to be here until grad an I don't want to and I'm not happy here at all and my moms side of the family doesn't know that my dad got married And that we moved here because of the marriage. What do I do I hate it here. And I tried to give it time but I just don't like it here

Have you talked to your dad about this?

Why the big secret with your mothers relatives? Have you spoken to them since you moved?

First let me see, he waited 7 years after the death of his wife to remarry, Men re-marry, I know it is not your mom, but are you not considering his feelings and his life. Kids grow up and move away, and at some point he has a right to a life also.

And what may sound like all of a sudden, if you knew about it somewhat before, Next sorry it is not your choice, you go where your dad tells you to go, and live where he tells you to live.

So when you turn 18, you can decide to move and live somewhere else.

And perhaps if you tried harder to make the move and be part of the new family, your dad may not be fighting so much either. ( not saying it is, but I am sure it does not help)

Ok, I pray for you.

I have talked to my dad but he doesn't listen it's always his wife first and kids second and it's like me and my brother aren't important anymore. And I didn't tell them because I didn't want them to be mad at me and I'm very close to them and I have talked to them after the move and I still do talk to them. And Ivdidnt want him to get married until I moved out because I didn't want to be apart of all the drama. Amani tried to be happy but there's always something that just ruins it. An I don't like how she treats my dad.she always yells at him when he does something nice and he has been sooooo nice to her kids and her and they don't care they just keep being mean to him and I hate it. My brother is to a point where he says he doesn't Carr anymore bcause every time he is with her he gets really mad at me and my brother and he yells at us for no reason and they are always on us and blaming us for doing things that we didn't even do. And it's very annoying.

Sorry about some of the words being messed up.I'm using my iPod

At 16 there's not too much you can do.

However, you do need to do something, you are there until you are 18.

You are apart of a merged family,and that's hard on everyone,and by your post you have lost the sense of fairness in the house, so how to improve matters.

Talking it out, asking for a family meeting, with rules, its hard to do, and can be hard for everyone to agree to sit down and talk about any issues,but it's a good start.

My advice is to talk to your step mother,however you feel about her, you have to find some common ground.

Nothing confrontational, something like asking her would she like some coffee, or offering to babysit the younger kids,you need to get her onside.

As for your dad, talk to him too, just shoot the breeze with him, find the connection again, a little effort on your part can make a big difference in your daily living.

Build up relationships with all of them so in time you can tackle the bigger issues.

Ok I'll try to thank you for helping me

There is always someone here to offer advice, your not on your own.

Well I'm sure your dad still has strong feelings for your mom,
He just feels it is time to move on with his life.
Im sorry for your loss.
But maybe you could ask one of your relatives if you could stay with them for a little while?
I hope all goes well you are a strong girl Daydreamer34!

Thank you so much love_1235 you are so nice and I understand about my dad moving on and I know he has feelings too just like everybody else but it's like he doesn't love me and my brother anymore because it's always his wife and she always comes first and he always says we come first before anybody but it's just like what about your kids... But I'm trying to get through to him but I don't think it's working.