We have been together for 7 years now Yes I am over 18 I was interested in having a threesome with him well another one but a hopefully better one... I have really no idea how to go about asking another woman no men to join us without sounding to upfront or stupid I want to lessen the embarrassing for both and just feel comfortable. I also would like to know I wrote to him a letter describing what I would like to happen during this threesome is it okay to follow or to at least try the way I would like I don't expect her to read it but he would know and I would know so we could lead the way together is this too much to ask or expect as well.

OK I have a question my fiancée works real hard during the week he is gone most of the week and we talk on the phone a lot. He is so in ti me on the phone but when he gets home he is to tired to even look my way. How can I change that factor about him because by the time we have discussed it on the phone and all week long boy do I want and need lovings when he comes home I don't want him to sleep. I feel so upset when this happens and our weekend usually isn't going to be great because then he just want me to to all the sexual favors and I get nothing I love giving them but need a something in return too.

If you want a threesome to work--and frankly, your idea of a threesome is somewhat immature--then all THREE of you sit down BEFORE it happens and discuss your expectations and rules. You MUST do this completely sober.

If you can't let her read the letter, then why in the world would she follow your script?

ALSO--she's not a blowup doll, there only for YOUR pleasure. What's in it for HER, if she can't get what SHE wants out of it too? Or are you hiring a hooker for this so that she follows the script you want for this?

I think you're stuck on the fantasy version of a threesome at this point and are not actually facing the REALITIES of a threesome.

There are some tough questions involved here, like:
1. What happens if she gets pregnant?
2. What happens if someone feels left out or used?
3. What happens when you feel like he's more into her than into you---and that WILL happen at some point during the threesome, or again, you're treating her like a doll and not like a person with sexual needs of her own.
4. What happens if someone doesn't like something they thought they would, but everyone ELSE is still really into it?
5. WHERE will this happen? You don't want it in YOUR bed, I promise you that.
6. What happens after? What are the rules for discussion and interaction AFTER you watch your boyfriend screw another girl?
7. What happens when he wants this to happen again?

You need to do some research on polyamorous relationships and on threesomes in general. Threesomes are about absolute, complete trust and communication. If you can't talk about it with him, openly and honestly and without embarrassment, then you're not ready to have one.

Before thinking about a threesome, you need to get your sex life in order. https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-...im-557777.html

Thank you to the person who merged the threads.

squeezeitforfun, I am going to address your on-going problem.

Are you giving him time to rest and unwind before demanding sex?

The two of you need to do more communicating about relaxing and letting go of stress instead of about getting into each other's pants. It sounds like he maybe feeling like you get yours, he rests, then he gets his and neither of you are really being satisfied. Try giving him time to rest, then if he still wants more than gives, don't give it until he pays more attention to your needs.

You are a couple. Work together to find a compromise that works for both of you.

Communication and Compromise are two cornerstones of a healthy relationship. Quite frankly, if you can't find a way to communicate and compromise on this, I think you may want to rethink getting married.

Good luck.

You are a couple work together to find a compromise.

My thought would be that if one on one sex isn't working and he is too tired, why would a threesome work?

Different excitement level, I guess.

Doesn't sound like a good idea to me.

Instead of beating about how you should fix your own sexual relationship with your partner - I'll answer your intended question.

Going online is an easy and less embarrassing way to meet third parties who would like to gladly hook up for a threesome. Most sexual dating websites are free for women to sign up due to the demand and also can easily have your profile limited to search for your searching criteria.

Examples - " What would YOU like to get out of the experience? What stimulates you the most?"

A good website could be something like http://www.upforit.com

A good idea would be for you and your partner to discuss what you would like to get from the experience and to write the profile up together.

Mango, we are answering her 'intended question'. Her two threads were merged. Read the second post. It was a separate question.

It is not a good idea to bring a third party into a relationship that has problems. Another person is only going to add to issues instead of helping solve them.

It seems they have had one threesome that didn't work out so well. I don't think a second one will do any better with the other problems they are having. If anything it could be worse especially if he gives the other woman the attention that she is not getting right now.

I think she wants to explore the world of threesome fantasy. Good luck to her!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mango99

Going online is an easy and less embarrassing way to meet third parties who would like to gladly hook up for a threesome. Most sexual dating websites are free for women to sign up due to the demand and also can easily have your profile limited to search for your searching criteria

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This is not only bad advice, but also very dangerous to the op AND her partner...

Do you remember the Craigslist killer in Boston back in 2009? And he was also an upstanding medical student who was engaged to be married... Yes, I followed that story and it was very scary.

Bad idea all together. You never know what you're dealing with.

OP, if you want to please your boyfriend, then just ask him what he desires...

Also, if you are considering having a threesome, then make sure that ALL three of you "sit down" and discuss it like adults.

Good luck.