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-   -   My ex is engaged and I'm broken hearted (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=557643)

  • Feb 24, 2011, 08:26 PM
    Broken10097
    My ex is engaged and I'm broken hearted
    My ex and I were together for 6 years, share children and have maintained a great friendship, there has been many times we've discussed getting back together and never tried due to the distance between us, he lives hours away, and the fact that we have both been in other relationships.

    Even though we were dating other people we always had that "never skipped a beat feeling" he is the love of my life. I always knew in my heart that we would come back together at the right time.

    He has been dating his now fiancé for year, but has always down played their relationship, so when he told me he was getting engaged I felt like a truck hit me, I never knew it was coming and considering she's only 21 I figured it was just a short term thing. He mentioned while telling me they were getting engaged that he knows we would have worked, if it was later in life.

    I feel so guilty for not trying again and for not telling him my true feelings...

    So do I just leave well enough alone and let it go?
  • Feb 24, 2011, 09:34 PM
    talaniman

    Wow, I can imagine your shock at his engagement, but I don't think it wise to desperately confess your true feelings because I don't think he shares them. If he did he wouldn't be engaged would he?

    You were together for 6 years, but how long have you been apart? You both have carved out separate lives, and lets be honest, you have had a lot of time to get your act together to be together.

    I think you wish him well, and get beyond your shock, and live and let live because he will obviously be apart of your life as long as your children are the bond between you.

    Was the distance the only thing that broke you up? Somehow, I don't think so. Move on and adjust your thinking as he has.
  • Feb 24, 2011, 10:58 PM
    Broken10097
    We've been broken up for four years, and we broke up due to a few reasons, we were young and had issues with finances, causing us to fight. We also had family who didn't approve of our relationship, which caused a lot of stress, and at that point in my life I was dependent on them and almost felt obligated to chose my family over him. We've talked this over and he understands... Not that it takes things back. He then took a job hours away and it finally was the straw that broke the camels back.
  • Feb 25, 2011, 12:27 AM
    redhed35

    If you still have a good relationship perhaps he played down the relationship because he knew how you felt, and knew it would hurt you, he may love you, as in you share a past and have children, but he's engaged and starting a new life, he's IN LOVE with her.

    He's moved on,making new life for himself and has been for quite some time.

    As hard as it is for you, wishing them both well is the right thing to do, and moving on with your life is the right thing for you.

    Holding on to a dead relationship will keep you from finding your new life.

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