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-   -   My boyfriend lied to me for months and I lied to him once just recently, what do I do (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=555814)

  • Feb 19, 2011, 08:28 AM
    AlexLovesAdam
    My boyfriend lied to me for months and I lied to him once just recently, what do I do
    My boyfriend and I started dating June 4th 2010 & He cheated on me in September and I didn't know until November when he had cheated on me again and I found out that one in a bad way.. He didn't tell me the truth about how he cheated or anything... I broke up with him when I found out (The day before his birthday) /: He had only kissed both Chicks and he continued to hangout with the 2nd one but she became really obsessive... he called me everyday and texted me all the time I still Loved him then after a month of trying to get me back doing and saying everything he could he promised he wouldn't ever lie or go against me again... And we are currently in a relationship. He told me he was going to delete his Fb not talk to any chicks make no new friends and won't smoke or drink or cheat or do anything "stupid" and he made me promise that stuff as well and I smoked because he called me yelling while I was at a friends house and I didn't tell him I did, then I recently smoked again and I told him and he was upset with me he wouldn't even tell me he loved me... He said if I did it again we were over, I don't know how he could threaten our relationship like that..

    (he used to smoke and drink)

    Do I tell him I smoked before? I really don't want to lose him but I hate how he is sort of controlling what I do and don't...
  • Feb 19, 2011, 08:31 AM
    JudyKayTee

    When you say "smoking," what are you talking about?

    Otherwise, yes, I find both of you trying to control each other.

    As far as the cheating - only you know if he'll cheat again. I'd be very suspicious of him now.
  • Feb 19, 2011, 08:35 AM
    AlexLovesAdam
    Well, I smoked a cigarette twice in different days and then I had smoked tea but that was it and I smoked tea twice and I only told him about the last time and he had got extremely upset
  • Feb 19, 2011, 08:37 AM
    JudyKayTee

    It sounds to me like you're both playing games, both of you dictating what the other person does or doesn't do.
  • Feb 19, 2011, 08:42 AM
    AlexLovesAdam
    I don't want to play games, I really just don't want to lose him... He is the first person I have ever loved and I really want to tell him what I have done but we haven't been good so far I'm trying to make him happy he says he is but then he says he's extremely stressed and that he's depressed and I don't think he is but I believe he is somewhat stressed and he can change that himself but he doesn't want to
  • Feb 20, 2011, 08:23 PM
    talaniman

    So its okay that a cheater tells you how to behave? Give me a break, and give yourself one too, by dumping his cheating controlling A(BUTT)S.

    If you don't respect your own dignity, why should he?

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