My mum hates me since young. She loves to use harsh words and calls me a b*itch every chance she gets. Her fav line is "f off and i hope you rot in hell". She always sides with my sister no matter what. I always get good grades and I did extremely well in coll. I'm 19 years old already. She would threaten to hit me and she did. I just don't get it. Why does she hate me and vent all her anger and frustrations at me? My dad would occasionally go out overseas to find jobs and she doesn't like it one bit. The days my dad goes away, she would find every way to vent it out on me. I once got scolded at at a restaurant and was told the 4letter word in public, left at a corner of a street far away from my house, beaten up so bad, thrown rubbish at and spitted at. I feel like dying everyday. She controls me everyway. I can hardly go out and when I do, she would get mad over small stuffs. I am treated unfairly by her and she is so biased. I swallowed pills before and today I wanted to slit my wrist but I was too afraid to do it. Help *** :(

At the age of 19 you are old enough to move out of her home.

If you are unable to do that, you need to call the police next time she lays a hand on you.

I have a friend like you.
Her mother apologized to her as she was dying, and said she didn't know why she did it.
My mother was not as mean as yours, and was mean to all of us, but I still felt more worthless than they did.
Maybe there's some secret.. such as you are not your father's daughter. Maybe your mother hates herself for some reason having to do with when you were conceived, and she takes it out on you.
You could get you and your dad's DNA done, but that's just a wild guess.
It would be nice if you could ask her, but somehow I don't think that will get an answer.
I agree about it being time to leave her.

She sounds angry and frustrated with her own life and unfortunately takes it out on you. Do you know if she has any health (physical or mental) concerns?

Giving you the benefit of the doubt that you don't ever cause any trouble, but even if you did, she should not be treating you in such a way.

As J_9 said, if at all possible, find a way to move out... on your own, with another family member, or a friend or maybe a few friends. Do you have any trusted family member you can confide in? Have you spoken to your father about what goes on?

If it comes to it, document every situation you can recall, and contact the police. However, you will need to be able to follow through on what may transpire as she obviously would not be happy about the situation.

I have to agree with the others who say your mom hates herself, and her life, and is taking it out on you, but not knowing where in the world you are, and what your culture is like, I would suggest leaving and standing on your own, but if you are unable to do that, can your father help? Or another relative?

I think it comes down to are you ready to stand on your own, and take care of yourself?

For most of your 19 years, you are saying you've been verbally and physically abused, and I'm wondering how this fell through the cracks.

Was there never a teacher, family friend, neighbour, etc. that witnessed the results of the abuse? What did your father do when you talked to him, and was there never a time, ever, that you were in a position where you could have talked to an adult, and asked for help?

You have described your mother as an out of control adult, that for whatever reason, picked you to take her frustrations and anger out on inappropriately.

When you say this, particularly: " left at a corner of a street far away from my house, beaten up so bad, thrown rubbish at and spitted at."- where did you go, and what did you do? What you have described is criminal assault, and if it happened frequently as you suggest, surely at some point there must have been involvement from social services or CPS, or the police?

Are there substance problems in the home, or mental illness that you think might be contributing to the behaviour of an out of control adult abusing a child.

And I'm confused with your statements of taking the pills, and contemplating slitting your wrists. Has this happened before, and were you even under the care of a Doctor to deal with these thoughts and actions. IF you are an unstable individual, now, just leaving may not be an option. But, there are options.

It would be good to have more information, as honestly as you can, to fill in some of the missing parts of this picture.