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Me and my boyfriend have been having unprotected sex and been trying for a baby for a year. We are desperate to be parents. We have sex quite often and have it during ovulation but no luck. I feel like giving up, as I have no hope left and am desperate for a baby. When I was younger I went on the pill at 15 and stopped at 16, may this have caused problems? Going on the pill at a young age? Should I go to the doctors and have tests? Please write back, I need help. :(
Whenever you have concerns, you should always go to a doctor, as they are the only ones who can give you a real and proper diagnosis. Secondly, how old are you? It takes most healthy couples At least a year to conceive, so not all hope is lost. May I ask why you want to become parents before you get married?its much easier to call it quits in a relationship outside of marriage. That would leave one of you with a baby, and a lot of responsibility.
I'm 23 and have been with my boyfriend since 16. We will be getting engaged. But he wants to finish his degree first, because once engaged we don't want to wait ages till getting married. Can the pill cause problems in the reproductive system if you take it before the appropriate age? :confused:
So long as you were taking the pill properly, I don't think it would hurt your reproductive system. The longer you are on a pill, the longer it may take to conceive. However, since you were on it for one year, and that was seven to eight years ago(correct?) I don't think that this would be the case... it is something that you could bring up to your doctor tho(as making an appointment with your doctor regarding the difficult time you are having concieving would be a good idea. Just to get a physical exam done, to make sure that everything is OK, and put any questions or anxieties at rest. Don't feel uneasy about this, as doctors answer these same questions and fears many times a day with many different patients) I would offer a suggestion though. It might be wise to put off trying to conceive until your boyfriend gets his degree. Or at least is close to getting it. Having a baby(or even just trying) can cause a lot of stress. Stress can be a big deterant for your efforts in concieving. Also, they are very expensive when they do come. Just a thought. As before mentioned, I would definitely get an appointment withyour ob/gyn and just have a chat with them about all your concerns and have it checked out. If nothing else, it will help you to be able to be more relaxed in your efforts, and therefore help you to conceive sooner... best of wishes. (ps, you should also start taking prenatals if you aren't takign them already. When you do get preggy, you will have a good foundation set up for new baby on the way.)
I agree with everything Buggage said. But let me point out this to you:
Having a child causes SO much stress on a relationship and a person that you can easily break up and/or quit school. Trust me, I have 4 kiddos, the oldest is 20 and the youngest is 4. I am a college student. Infants and studies do not go well together.Quote:
Originally Posted by kayeuk90
Then have a short engagement, there is nothing wrong with that.Quote:
Originally Posted by kayeuk90
Why have a child before finishing the degree? That is harder than being married and finishing the degree.
I believe it might be time to line up your priorities.
1) finish degree
2) get married
3) have a child
In that order life is SOOOOOO much simpler. He will have a career, you all will have financial stability, then comes baby!!
What is the appropriate age?Quote:
Originally Posted by kayeuk90
Look, Kaye, you really need to re-think what you are planning right now. You are actually going backward. Once you go backward it is hard, and sometimes impossible, to go forward. Please reorganize your plans.
See, if you have a child and you are not married, he is not finished with school, then stress of a sick child or money issues, etc, etc, etc arise, he will get to a point where it is too expensive to finish school. Then he quits, no degree, no degree = money to raise a child. Then he takes it out on you and/or the baby. Then he leaves and you are stuck raising a child by yourself.
It is time to think rationally Kaye. No offense, but the way you have it planned right now is a catastrophe waiting to happen.
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