When my girlfriend broke up with me (NOT a mutual break up by the way, I wanted it, she didnt) she left me with the apartment we got together right before our move in date. I was nice enough to take action to remove her name off the lease so that she would not be stuck with any legal obligation. I know what everyone is going to automatically ask; why wouldn't I want her to legally by financially liable for her half? Because 1) She literally has no money and was borrowing half of her half (so 1/4 of the rent) at our old place from her parents because she's still in school. 2) You guys! She has no $! Not like ha ha, I have $10 broke. No,like -$60 in her account broke! 3) Im nice and would like to be an adult and be on good terms with an ex as we have a lot of mutual friends and are apart of a small community.

Sooooo with that being said, the emotional part of the break up has been a bit of a roller coaster. I've had a lot of nights crying and a lot of nights convincing myself I was OK. Back and forth about if Im ready to date again, and all other emotions that go along with post break up rejection. While all this emotion is going on, as far as my ex knows I'm doing just fine!! Peachy keen! She thinks that because we aren't quite friends but have had limited contact and when we do "catch up" Im all, "Im awesome! How are you?!". I've gone as far as to tell her I am seeing someone now, which I am, and we both have discussed our current love life. And believe it or not I am happy with her seeing and meeting new people!! Trust me, I would never believe I'd get to that point! Or am I at that point?.

Recently, our mutual friend (more her friend than mine honestly), called and asked if I was still in fact looking for a roommate. I said yes. Because being left with the apartment I had to get a second job to pay for the entire rent by myself. We told my ex about the new living arrangements just to give her a heads up. She agreed that it was cool and said she 'didnt want any trouble', whatever that means. But now, Im getting nervous because as far as my ex knows I'm awesome and cool and excited for her moving on! Therefore, she thinks I have moved on and 100% over her. And they hang quite a bit so Im expecting them to continue to. The only thing is... I haven't seen my ex since the break up 5 months ago because she moved away but is now moving back. Its so much easier to move on when they aren't even living in the same city. But now she not only will be living here again but her good friend is now my roommate!! Im afraid if I see her again it will backtrack my moving on process! I think I fooled myself about moving on and am nervous to see her and am afraid my feelings will come back!
Yes! I have already asked ALL of my friends if they could move in, and No, I don't want to post for a stranger to move in. Help! Some advice?

You agreed to this crap, so bite the bullet, and take the money, or keep working two jobs until the lease is up and YOU can move.

I keep working two obs because you will freak if she hangs out with your room mate and she sleeps over.

Or talk to the friend, and set some rules, no sleep overs, and the ex isn't allowed under no circumstances. Get it in writing.

I think you're right. I might have to set some rules with my roommate for my sake. And yeah! Might just keep both jobs to avoid possible run ins anyway!

I think what you have done is compromised your privacy, and also opened up a whole can of worms.

What are you going to do when your new roommate wants to invite your ex over for coffee. Or what happens if you are suddenly feeling like a third wheel in your own apartment. You have no idea how much of an influence your ex is going to have on you, let alone now that she's moving back, and her friend is moving in with you. You even went so far as to have 'permission' from your ex about the whole thing. (a head's up I think you said)

I know you don't want to get an answer here, telling you to find a different roommate, but that is what you need to do, before you find yourself posting again about how to handle this living arrangement, that includes, direct contact by your ex.

But that is what you have to do in my opinion. Before the new person is on the lease, simply tell him/her that you have changed your mind and have made other arrangements. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone, or offer up what will sound like lame excuses, or offer up the real reason, which is that you are not over your ex, and having a mutual friend move in will compromise your healing.

Keep your business to yourself, and either find a cheaper apartment, or keep working two jobs to pay for the one you have now, on your own. Or, try for a person that you don't know.

The main point is, you are still healing from the breakup, and to allow a situation to happen where she will be likely front and centre in your life again, with a mutual friend in the middle, doesn't bode well.