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-   -   Claiming a child without court stating the custodial parent (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=551679)

  • Feb 5, 2011, 06:14 PM
    kenneya08
    Claiming a child without court stating the custodial parent
    I have a two year old and I left with my daughter in March 2010 and since then he has only been able to see her with visitation at my mothers house due to his unstable living conditions and confrontational girlfriend. I have never received or asked for child support he has seen her less then 10 times since March 2010. I went to file my taxes and received a call back stating that my daughter had already been claimed. I have an appointment to file them by paper but my question is, I have no legal paperwork to prove I am the custodial parent I have been the only one financially providing for her once I file what is going to happen? Do I have any chance of getting that money back? What paperwork should I have?
  • Feb 5, 2011, 06:19 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    You will have to file your taxes, normally in written form, you will need to explain that the child lives with you and you provide all support. And that there is no court order that allows the other person to claim the child.

    You do not have to prove that you have the right to claim the child, only that the child lives full time with you

    While not related to the taxes direclty
    1. is he on the birth certificate ?
    2. where you married or are you still married to him


    If there is no custody order and no support order, he does not owe anything to you at this point, until you file for that support
    So unless you have filed for child support, you really have no right to complain he has not paid support
  • Feb 5, 2011, 07:54 PM
    grammadidi

    I don't think the original poster was complaining that he had not paid support. I think her concern is that she is the one supporting her daughter yet the child's father is claiming the daughter as his dependent despite not paying support.

    Kenneya08, you are the person who should rightfully claim the child as a dependent as you have had PHYSICAL custody. Even if he did pay support, he would claim the support as a deduction not claim her as a dependent. Whether there is a court order is not important as far as IRS goes. Just be honest, tell them that you have physical custody and he has not paid support. If they require anything else, they will let you know.

    I do want to add that for your own protection (as well as that of your daughter) you really should file a support and custody order against your ex. He is entitled to visitation regardless of whether he pays support or not, but that way he cannot claim that he is paying support when he's not to have his taxes reduced plus the chances of a custody order coming up later are lessened. For instance, IF he were to ever take your child out of state you wouldn't have a leg to stand on, legally. In addition, you can have it on file that you request supervised visitation which will make it more difficult for him to attempt to get custody at a later date.

    If you don't want a lot from him, take a token amount based upon his income. The fact is that if he is her father (or accepted the father role in her life) he should contribute to her care in some way AND have visitation rights (which it sounds like you have been). It's not about you and your needs, it's about the child and her needs - both emotional and physical at 2 years of age or 20 years of age. It's difficult for a teen or young adult to feel loved if one of her parent's didn't care enough to contribute to her care. If you don't need the money, put it in trust for her education.

    Hugs, Didi
  • Feb 5, 2011, 08:16 PM
    kenneya08
    Comment on grammadidi's post
    Thank you! I really appreciate your answer
  • Feb 5, 2011, 08:18 PM
    kenneya08
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    No one was complaining I was simply stating it in relation to who provides for the child for the year in reference to filing for taxes but that you for your answer. I have mail that has her name since we moved what other kind of proof would I need?
  • Feb 5, 2011, 08:46 PM
    grammadidi

    I really don't think that they will require you to have any proof. They will probably contact him and tell him that you have also claimed her as a dependent and request a meeting with him to hear his side of things. Probably he will say that he thought he could claim her because she lived with him for part of 2010 and all will be well.

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