Okay, first off, I am 17 , but I am not one of those girls who went and had unprotected sex and am now wondering if I am pregnant. Yes, I am sexually active with my boyfriend of over a year, but we are always as safe as possible.

Since the first time we had sex, which was not all too long ago and we were each others first, my maternal instinct has gone through the roof. My body is almost screaming for me to get pregnant and to carry his child, but I don't want to. Even when I was young, I never wanted to have my own babies, I always wanted to adopt.

The idea of pregnancy scares me half to death, there is just so much that could go wrong very easily. Plus, infants scare the living bajeesus out of me, they are so fragile and require complete attention.

I don't know what to do about my conflicting feelings. Yes I am too young to have a baby, but I'm thinking about the future. I have a pretty bad temper problem that has really done nothing but get worse as I get older. I do want to have a baby, somewhere deep inside, but I'm afraid. What if I don't have the proper health to keep the baby alive? What if I'm a bad mother?

Is pregnancy really worth it? How would I know if I'm ready to become a mom?

Before I go further, could you please tell me what you DO do to prevent pregnancy?

You do realize that intercourse, no matter the form of protection used, can end up in pregnancy.

I am on birth control and we use condoms.
I know that it could end in pregnancy and I feel that I am able to deal with those consequences if necessary, but I'm still afraid of if I do have to take that step and if I could be a good mother.
I do want to be a mom at some point, I'm just afraid of pregnancy...

I would say that you should wait. We all get those urges when we're younger. When I was a teen I couldn't wait to be a mom, but boy am I glad that I didn't get pregnant as a teen.

I was 27 when I got pregnant with my son, and he was worth the wait. Being a mom is hard enough under the best of circumstances, but being financially secure, having your own home, being in a committed long term relationship, those things definitely help.

Pregnancy can be scary, but it's also an amazing thing to experience, when you're old enough to experience it. :)

Is the actually pregnancy term unpleasant? I love children but the idea of one being fully dependent on me and my personal health worries me. I'm afraid that I wouldn't be good enough to raise a happy child and make my mother's mistakes.
I do want to wait until I'm out of school and in my own place, but there is still all the uncertainty of what the future brings

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Originally Posted by Kyu745

Is the actually pregnancy term unpleasant? I love children but the idea of one being fully dependent on me and my personal health worries me. I'm afraid that I wouldn't be good enough to raise a happy child and make my mother's mistakes.
I do want to wait until I'm out of school and in my own place, but there is still all the uncertainty of what the future brings

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There's no way to answer the question about how pregnancy feels. It's different for everyone, and different from one pregnancy to the next. With my son I felt great. I never had morning sickness, I was full of energy. In fact, I felt better then I had in a long time. With my daughter I was sick pretty much throughout the entire pregnancy. My back hurt like crazy. I was miserable.

They were both worth it, and because I was older, I really got to enjoy them. My husband and I had a home, we both made good money. We didn't have to worry about where the next bag of diapers came from, or how we'd afford a crib and all that stuff.

One thing I can tell you. A baby puts a lot of strain on a relationship. Even the best relationships can have problems when baby comes along. It takes work, and it takes a lot of compromise from both people. You won't just be a couple anymore, you'll be a family. It's hard, and it's a lot of work. It's even harder if you're struggling because you're young and don't have the means to financially care for a child and it's needs. That's why most teen parents don't stay together. The stress is just too much at your age.

As for making mistakes. You will. You're human. That's one thing you learn when you become a mother. You learn that your mother, she wasn't the superhuman machine you thought she should be. She's human, and we humans make mistakes. It's learning from them that makes the difference. No matter what you will screw up at one time or another. We all do.

Give it a few years, 7 or 8 would be best. :) You have plenty of time to be a mom and do it right. There's no hurry, and you and the baby will be better off for having waited. :)

No we all like babies but I was 17 and now have four I'm 31 the hardest thing you'll ever do, so please wait until you have car house and financials coming in