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-   -   This morning I woke up and my boyfriend was taking a picture of me (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=549733)

  • Jan 31, 2011, 11:24 AM
    tayla210
    This morning I woke up and my boyfriend was taking a picture of me
    This morning I woke up but still kept my eye's closed. To my boyfriend taking a picture of me sleeping. With mu top pulled down. We have been together for 6 months I'm 18 and he's 26. What is wrong with him why would he do something like this. And I pretended I was still asleep..
  • Jan 31, 2011, 11:35 AM
    I wish

    Why don't you ask him?
  • Jan 31, 2011, 12:06 PM
    ken007nielsen
    Yeah, ask him - then get that picture back, don't ask for it take it, he might take copies - I'm a guy, and that **** is messed up. He should ask if it's okay!
  • Jan 31, 2011, 12:46 PM
    tayla210
    I'm worried about asking him.. I am going to confront him I'm just worried on how he will react. What type of guy would do this. Especially when I sleeping? That what I really don't get. He knows if he wanted a picture that I would let him take when when I'm awake,


    Well I don't know if I would let him now..
  • Jan 31, 2011, 12:57 PM
    Alty

    The only one that knows why he did it is him. You'll have to ask him. If you're afraid to ask him then that's a huge alarm that there's something wrong with the relationship.

    What he did is not okay, and you have a right to confront him about it.
  • Jan 31, 2011, 01:07 PM
    tayla210
    I will say something to him when he gets home from work. But what I really want to know is do some guys get off on pictures of there girfirends when there sleep. Or did he do it because he thought I wouldn't let him take a picture when I'm awake? Or is it just messed up.. please give me your opinions
  • Jan 31, 2011, 01:12 PM
    Alty

    This is my opinion only, like I said, only he knows why he did it.

    To me it's messed up. If he did it because he thought you wouldn't let him, then he has severe boundary issues, and moral issues. He took a picture of your body without your permission, and he was hoping, without you knowledge, and if you're right, because he thought that he wouldn't let you. He doesn't know you woke up, which makes it even worse.

    This could be happening all the time, this is just the first time you've caught him.

    It's a severe invasion of privacy, and abuse of trust. If it were me, this would be a deal breaker.

    That's my opinion. :)
  • Jan 31, 2011, 01:42 PM
    answerme_tender

    This whole situation is weird. Him taking pictures of you while sleeping and then you being to scared to sit up and ask him what the heck he was doing!! Then still acting to scared to even ask him later to advise why he took the picture.

    Listen if you are too scared to sit up and tell someone you are apparently sleeping with to knock it off,and not to over step his boundries then you need to END this relationshp ASAP. Why would you even sleep with someone you don't feel completely safe with, and Im not just talking physically, but verbally?

    I wish you well --take care
  • Jan 31, 2011, 02:04 PM
    I wish

    We can speculate all day, but let's just wait and see what he says.

    Though I'm not sure he has any good reason for taking pictures of you asleep without your permission. So lots of reds flags already.
  • Jan 31, 2011, 02:07 PM
    tayla210
    I'm not to scared I just sent him a text. He's at work atm. And I didn't sit up when he was doing it because well I was a little scared. He hasn't wrote back yet so I have no idea how he is going to react. Thank you for all your answers and helping me out
  • Jan 31, 2011, 02:09 PM
    tayla210
    That is so true he isn't going to have an answer he will probably just deny it and delete the picture at work.. what am I going to do then?
  • Jan 31, 2011, 02:12 PM
    I wish

    If he denies it, then we caught him lying. Do you really want to be with a boyfriend who lies to you? What you do is break up.

    I understand that a lot is going through your mind right now, but the best thing you can do is to stay calm and confront him. Let him explain himself. If you're not comfortable with his explanation, then you're going to need to press for a few more answers. If you can't have an honest and open relationship, then this relationship is going to end whether you want to or not.
  • Jan 31, 2011, 02:13 PM
    talaniman

    My wife just informed me that if I did what your boyfriend did, she would have shoved the camera so far up my a$$, I would confess to anything.

    Just saying!!
  • Jan 31, 2011, 02:40 PM
    tayla210
    He said he didn't mean to and the photo is just blackness. And that he'll show me
  • Jan 31, 2011, 06:11 PM
    Homegirl 50

    How long have you been dating this guy?
    Someone does not accidentally or unintentionally point a camera at you while you sleep.
    You saw what he did and he lied. Why are you still there?
    Taking pictures of you without your permission is wrong and creepy, it's like stealing from you.
    Why are you still there?
  • Jan 31, 2011, 06:55 PM
    DoulaLC
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by tayla210 View Post
    he said he didnt mean to and the photo is just blackness. and that he'll show me

    Ok, this may sound harsh, but what a crock! He didn't mean to? He obviously had to pull your top down, had to go get the camera, and had to take the picture!

    Personally, I would seriously consider ending the relationship if things don't add up or don't feel right to you. How can you trust that it hasn't happened before and you just didn't wake up? You caught him red handed and he still lied to you!

    DO NOT give him permission to take such a picture even when you are awake!

    Were you afraid he would get mad at you if you asked him about it? You should be able to talk to him about anything. Would you be afraid that he may get upset and/or leave you if you don't let him take a picture while you are awake?
  • Jan 31, 2011, 07:02 PM
    Alty
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by tayla210 View Post
    he said he didnt mean to and the photo is just blackness. and that he'll show me

    He didn't mean to? LMAO!

    Let me guess, he's the type of guy that would cheat and his defense would be "I didn't mean to, I tripped and my penis fell into her". :rolleyes:

    You can do a lot better than this guy.
  • Jan 31, 2011, 07:06 PM
    tayla210
    It was on his mobile phone not a camera.. and he said he didn't mean to take the picture he said he will show me when he gets home.. he said it is all blackness. And yes to the bottom of doulalc's question
  • Jan 31, 2011, 07:08 PM
    tayla210
    We have been dating for 6 month I am 18 and he is 26
  • Jan 31, 2011, 07:18 PM
    DoulaLC
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by tayla210 View Post
    it was on his mobile phone not a camera.. and he said he didnt mean to take the picture he said he will show me when he gets home.. he said it is all blackness. and yes to the bottom of doulalc's question

    Then you need to think about how you are going to end this relationship. You do not want to stay involved with someone you can't trust or believe in.

    You either saw him taking a picture or you didn't. Doesn't matter what he took it with, he still had to get it to take the picture!

    If you can't talk to him, if you don't feel he is being honest with you, if you are afraid of him leaving you if you don't do certain things or behave in a certain way, then he is not the one for you to be with. Don't let fear keep you there. Being on your own is better then being in a relationship that is not what you really want.

    Think of it this way... if your best friend came to you with this situation, what would you tell her?

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