My boyfriend is going to prison for over a year and the only way I can see him is if I marry him and become his wife. I don't love him but I don't want to not be able to see him either. He says that he loves me and that it'll make the prison experience easier if he can see me occasionally. Plus, he says if I don't want to stay married, he's willing to make the marriage "temporary" or something by putting some kind of time limit on it? I don't really know the details of that. He's going to be marked as a felon (not a "strike" felon though). I don't know much about legal issues either since I'm still kind of young. Is it worth it? Should I marry him?

No, you don't have to marry him inorder to see him while he is away serving time. You just have to wait in line like everyone else.

Also in being married he may think it holds another advantage. Marriage isn't something to fool with. It has legal obligations.

Absolutely No. You cannot trust him,
Can you say with full confidence that after 1 year he will keep his words?
If he slips you'll be in big trouble.
And somewhere inside in yourself you also know that he's nice but not so trustworthy.
So, wait if you wanted to, other wise move on towards future.
Regards,

No idea where you got an idea that you had to marry him to see him in prison.

Girl friends or just friends can all visit once they have been approved and put on a visitation list.

Do you really want to spend over a year being tied to someone you don't love, that you can't see very often, that will prevent you from getting to know anyone else you might want to spend time with?

Don't marry him. You don't love him, you can still visit if you wanted to without being married. Write him letters if you want to stay in contact, then go out with friends and enjoy yourself. Odds are very good that you will meet someone else who is free (literally) to be with you that you can develop a relationship with.

How young is 'still kind of young'?

You don't love him. Why hold on to him out of habit or as a back up plan until you meet someone else? Remain friends if that is an option you are both open to.

He may 'love' you. However, I suspect there is something else going on in his mind such as using this as a way to get a permanent hold on you.

I suggest you look up the visitation restrictions for the prison where he is supposed to be incarcerated. They should be available on-line. You might find out things aren't as he says they are.

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Should I marry him just so I can see him in prison?

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No, just sign up to be put on the visitors list.

I will guess they still do this, came to me today

If you are married, in some states, they have sexual visits allowed, perhaps the inmate is hoping to have sex while in prison with someone besides Bubba

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Originally Posted by geekunmow

My boyfriend is going to prison for over a year and the only way I can see him is if I marry him and become his wife. I don't love him... Is it worth it? Should I marry him?

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NO and Ell NO. Tell him it was nice while it lasted but you have to get on with your precious life. Don't write to him and don't feel guilty... move on...

God Bless.

I wouldn't marry him BUT they are friends. What's the harm in writing him?

I wouldn't marry him, geez when people ask where you husband is, do you really want to have to explain that he is in prison!! Do yourself a favor, do what Judy advise just write him.

Why on earth would you marry someone you don't love who is also going to prison? If he wants to put you on his visitor list, you can visit him. Otherwise write him. I wouldn't even marry someone I DID love who was going to prison...

Read your own question - if anyone else posted it, what would your answer be? "yeah, marry the criminal and spend your life off the market, stuck with someone you don't love"?