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-   -   My husband remembered another girl after we had sex (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=544539)

  • Jan 16, 2011, 06:42 AM
    ilovecappuccino
    My husband remembered another girl after we had sex
    My husband had been rumored to have an affair with a married woman when he was yet single but he said it was all but rumor and has no truth on it.After 6 years we dated and became married.I accepted all his past including his denials on his alleged affair with that married woman.But my suspicions started after one time we had sex he remembered that woman and said how flawless that woman is.I felt so insulted and betrayed that moment and begun nagging him about the truth between them.Tho he still stick on his denial I just can't make myself believe on him anymore.

    Do I have enough basis to mistrust him and never believed that there was no extramarital affair happened between them?I got nothing to do to change his past.But I think I deserved to know the truth and demand for his honesty.

    Please help me..
  • Jan 16, 2011, 08:18 AM
    Fr_Chuck

    If he had sex with some women years before you meet, and all it is now is a memory, opinion, get a life, he is with you, and perhaps he is a jerk for saying something about another women but so he lied years ago about having sex with someone BEFORE you meet, so what, who cares,

    And no you will never accept the truth , esp if he did not have sex, he will have to lie ( if he did not) and say he did, for you to really believe him,

    So love him drop it and get a grip on reality here.
  • Jan 16, 2011, 08:20 AM
    jeje409
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Amen!
  • Jan 16, 2011, 09:03 AM
    jmjoseph

    The windshield is bigger than the rearview mirror.

    Don't let the past ruin your future.

    No matter how selfish and stupid his comments are.

    How does he treat you? If he's so disrespectful as to compare you to another woman, to whom he cheated with, then I wonder how he acts behaves.
  • Jan 16, 2011, 07:50 PM
    ilovecappuccino
    Comment on jmjoseph's post
    He openly appreciate other women and slap it right on my face but whatever effort I do to make myself presentable in his eyes my efforts were just n vain.I don't think wives should only feel cheated once their husband had sex with another woman.
  • Jan 16, 2011, 07:54 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Many men will have had sex with many women before they meet someone that they will be true to. That is the real issue, not their past. And yes he was out of line mentioning another women, but most likely it was a slip.

    And it is not about you, but it was a memory,

    And if he does not show you affection or treat you good, that is another issue, but does not have anything to do with this other women.
  • Jan 18, 2011, 06:12 AM
    smoothy

    Get a life... jeez 'O petes.

    Do you ever leave the house? He's going to see other women anyplace you go.

    Do you EVER amd I mean EVER cast a glance at another man... even on TV... in your thoughts? Have YOU ever kissed another guy.. EVER?

    If you EVER have then that makes you a hypocrite.

    If you really are as paranoid and stuck on this one thing... seek therapy... because he's going to get bent out of shape at some point and he's going to walk. Count your blessings he has cared enough about you to stick around this long. Its not too late yet to learn to deal with the fact his life wasn't a vacuum before he met you... and the fact he is entitled to his memories... they are after all in fact HIS.

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