Of late (last few days) my fiancé has been sleeping most of the day and not really paying attention to me and my needs. He says everything is boring and that sleeping passes time or w/e. LOL he always yells at me because I say that all the time. He never in my 2 year's of knowing him said he's ''bored''. He's been out of it and grouchy when I ask. First of all, he's hardly ever tired, and sleep's same time as I do. He doesn't work so that's not a factor. He said he's not sick and he doesn't look sick. I feel he is mad at me or something, because he has been wanting to do things of a sexual nature, but I don't want to. Plus, he get's anoyed because I ask him what's wrong more then once. When I ask a question I expect it to be answered mainly because I feel its my right to know what's going on and what the hell his problem is. I'm getting anoyed, I hate to be ignored and left sitting by myslef. I just want to know is wrong with him, it's getting me angry. Maybe someone has a few thoughts...

Sounds to me like he IS bored, of you. I'd guess you two have run into a routine that doesn't make him happy. Asking him what's wrong is like asking a drowning person to describe the water, you're just going to piss him off because he feels like you should be fixing the problem. My suggestion is to not be so boring. Those sexual things are one of the big things that are causing the problem. Go out of your way to surpise the hell out of him. Head out to the mall and score a skanky outfit and get it on with him out of nowhere. Vigorously. Very vigorously.

Personally, after reading all of your posts Rayne, I think you both need to get out and get jobs.

How are you paying your rent? Neither one of you works, according to your posts. I hope you are not living off the system.

Apparently you are spending too much time together. You both need
To mature a little bit.

Sorry it sounds harsh, but I don't think either one of you realize what it takes to make a relationship. Working outside the home and away from one another does a world of good.

Honestly, Meg,I don't think his attitude has all that much to do with you... if he's sleeping more than usual and is bored with life he might be depressed... maybe a trip to a doctor or counsellor would be a good idea

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Originally Posted by sillygirl_24

Honestly, Meg,I don't think his attitude has all that much to do with you...if he's sleeping more than usual and is bored with life he might be depressed....maybe a trip to a doctor or counsellor would be a good idea

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I'm going to strongly disagree with this. I was this dude in the middle of last year, and I can say that when I was doing it, it was because I was bored of my girlfriend at the time. I felt like she stopped caring about me, and was just going through the motions, and I hated having to spoon feed her every little detail about how to make me happy, I felt like she should just know. This isn't exactly right, but it's the way I felt. Once she started making an effort and switching things up a bit, mostly sexually, I came back to life.

The reason I got so mad when she kept asking me what was wrong was because I felt like I had already told her, and she was just nagging me until she got a response that didn't mean she was doing something wrong. Every stupid little thing would set me off too, stuff like her leaving the TV on after she left, stupid shlt like that. I wouldn't yell and scream, but it just aggrivated me for no reason at all. If this sounds like him, then it's probobly what I described.

He is either very selfish and wants to get his way or very immature to play games and instead of communicating. I hope you fall for none of these antics and he needs a job since he has so much time on his hands.

--I'll try to clear this up... sry (heehhee) well I talked to him and he said that it's because he's honestly bored. Two days ago he was sick and slept all day and also was bored because of waiting for a call from a job opertunity. Then yesterday, he slept all day because he said he was bored. I don't have any reason's to disbelieve him. He's never lied to me in our hole 2yr relationship, it's mostly been me lying in the past. We have a gret relationship, so I honestly don't think its because he's bored of me and because he's being selfish. We talked and he just was bored and tired. Also, he's worked ever since I met him, but when we moved into gether, he got a job at place he didn't like and it was harder work then he was used to. So he ended up not working there anymore. He's tried to apply lot's of places and its not easy to get a job, so this isn't about if he's lazy or if I am. I've never had a job, but that doesn't mean I'm lazy. I've applied places too, but no one will hire me. Maybe because I dropped out--i had good reason which if needed I'll explain. But yea, I was thinking it's a problem he neeeds to see doc for, or that it might be due to my lack of interest in him sexually. He said that he's not upset about that, it's just strange for him since I suddenly changed. --I don't know why. But he has a problem with waking up. His doc said that he needs to just start a route. We did that and it doesn't seem to be working. Hope this clears up afew things, sorry hehe.

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Originally Posted by Raynefreak

Of late (last few days) my fiance has been sleeping most of the day and not really paying attention to me and my needs. He says everything is boring and that sleeping passes time or w/e. LOL he always yells at me b/c i say that all the time. He never in my 2 year's of knowing him said he's ''bored''. He's been out of it and grouchy when i ask. First of all, he's hardly ever tired, and sleep's same time as i do. He doesn't work so that's not a factor. He said he's not sick and he doesn't look sick. I feel he is mad at me or something, b/c he has been wanting to do things of a sexual nature, but i don't wanna. Plus, he get's anoyed because i ask him what's wrong more then once. when i ask a question i expect it to be answered mainly because i feel its my right to know what's going on and what the hell his problem is. I'm getting anoyed, i hate to be ignored and left sitting by myslef. I just want to know is wrong with him, it's getting me angry. Maybe someone has a few thoughts...

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Time for a break..
You guys should go for a vaccation, or a long drive.

Honestly you both need to get a job!!

Sitting around waiting for the phone to ring is an excuse. Believe me, been there done that with a partner. It is an excuse not to get a job.

I am sorry if he had a job that was hard work, but isn't that why they call it WORK!? It's not supposed to be a piece of cake!!

You both need to start a routine every day. Get up at 6 shower get dressed and hit the pavement at 8. Like I said, I hope you are not living off welfare!! We work HARD to support people on welfare.

Neither of you work, how do you pay your phone bill, rent, INTERNET connection?

He has a problem waking up because he has no motivation, he does not care. Believe me, we have seen many young people in our lives and we know when they are making excuses, this is what he is doing, excuses, nothing else.

Ok, well we don't sit for the phone to ring, he has been applying applying and applying. He stopped his last job or they fired him because he wasn't fast enough and it was hurting him and because it wasn't safe. We know it's not easy. I'm trying to get a GED b/4 a job because that is needed. I've posted on that already. We have started a route a few weeks ago. We get up at 8 and sleep at 12. We are not living off Welfare. We may get food stamps, and I am getting Access. It's not easy for 20 year old's with no parent's to live. BUT we are trying to make life work and make the best of everything. We use our savings and or credit card. --I hate credit cards so I know using them too much is not good. His problem waking up, was confermed BY the doctor. I was there his parent's were there. He has a mental problem. He can't even be treated with certain things at the hospital. He woln't wake up. He in fact does care, he always runs around here and there and is upset that people are giving us no information like we deserve. I am thankful for the advice and comment's, but if you knew the whole situation you'd think differently. I even said its only been a few days, so that means that its not been going on for a long time. A few days. I know when I'm making excussess. And I'm not, so this maybe will clear it all up. Im also not too young, I'm 21 and I know what I'm doing or lack thereof. I know I should be searching for a job harder, but this isn't about me, or a job or welfare or etc. I just wanted to know if anyone had any ideas as to why he was acting funny for 2 days. I think we need to visit the doc again.

Oh and Welfare isn't doing there job's, so make sure if someone needs help, know you will be calling and calling and left in the dark because the system is horrble.

Every time you post we get more info so maybe we have to get the whole story before we can think of answers for you.

I'm telling you. This was me. I've been exactly where he was before. Switch the routine up. Do some things you've never done before to show him you care and you're willing to do something you don't want to because it will make him happy. It's not exploitation, it's about your willingness. Routine - Apply for a job, fail. Ask for something, don't get it. Want to do something, can't. BREAK THE ROUTINE. As somebody you've never spoken with or met, I'm 100% certain. This isn't a problem you caused, but its one you can fix. Don't look to doctors or outside sources, that's what's making him upset. It doesn't matter weather you can meet his needs, it matters if you try.