Hi me and my partner have been trying for a baby for nearly fourf years and I still am not pregnant, we have been together for a long time and I am only 21 he is 31 and he already has 2 children from a previous relationship but I am too scared to go to the doctors as I know deep down inside me that its me with the problem because he already has kids and if I get told I can't have kids it would break both our hearts at least not knowing I can hope! What do I do? Please help m in turmoil.

Hi keri,

Me and hubby had the same problem (I'm 27 he 38) we were trying for 3 years and decided to go to the docs, he went first and was told he had low sperm count but would probably still get someone pregnant (doctors words not mine) then I went and I was crapping myself I was told after a scan that I had polycystic ovaries and together we had a 5% chance of conception, I was gutted so we thought about our options and went for adoption of a child instead (not an easy decision).

Anyway not to put the dampeners on you anymore we are now 4 1/2 yrs down the line and I am 32 weeks pregnant so all is not lost.

Do you have regular periods, I didn't but never the less here I am getting my dream (it's been a medical nightmare since but all turned out good.

I hope you will go see your doctor all is not lost. If you want to get in touch e-mail me.

First why ever be scared of a doctor, and actually since he is older, if anyone has a problem it may well be him since as one is older more things happen, but couples can be together for 10 years and never have a baby, others have one first time they had sex.

First it has to be at just the right time each month when you have sex. Next the sperm has to make it to the egg and attach.

So more likely, you need to work more on the timing of your sex.

So get the medical check, get hubby checked also. Then talk with your doctor about methods and timming