My husband has a 1 year old son who he is not currently seeing due to not having a phone number or a address. She claims that she moved from her current address, and she has had her phone disconnected. Can she move without giving him an updated address? Can she move out of state?

Is there a visitation ORDER? Is he the acknowledged father - perhaps through DNA?

In NY if there is no ORDER and he is not seeing the child, yes, she can move. She MIGHT be able to move, despite an Order, upon modification of that Order due to special circumstances.

I assume he's paying support. Where does he send it? That's the address he will need to use in order to get the visitation order enforced OR a new Order granted.

Yes there is a visitation order, but we have not been able to exercise those due to not knowing were she is. She can move anywhere in Texas, but she is ordered to update the information. The place she is claiming she moved is another 3 hours from were we live making the trip 10 hours there and 10 hours back. He sends the money order to the Texas child support collection unit.

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Originally Posted by jsje2010

Yes there is a visitation order, but we have not been able to exercise those due to not knowing were she is. She can move anywhere in Texas, but she is ordered to update the information. The place she is claiming she moved is another 3 hours from were we live making the trip 10 hours there and 10 hours back. He sends the money order to the texas child support collection unit.

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In NY you can get the address from the support collection unit. You will have difficulty arguing that she should not be allowed to move when your husband has not seen the child in a lengthy period. She can respond with a legal argument that she has other employment, a better living situation, whatever the case may be.

Go back to Court to get the visitation order enforced. If you know where she is (and apparently you do) have it served it at that address. The Judge who hears your argument will decide what to do about the move.

Normally they can move "in state" unless there is a specific clause to the custody order, my wife and I had an agreement in the custody order we could not move more than 30 miles away without permission of the other, That way there was no issue in visiting. * I had custody, she had visits**

So where and how she can move needs to be outlined specificly in the court order,

If she will not provide one, he can take her back to court, to order her to provide one or be found in contempt of court.

And why haven't you gone back to the court and asked to have her cited for contempt? That's the way to enforce a visitation order.

How do you have her cited for contempt? We are waiting to hear back from Legal aid to see if they will approve us since we do not have the money for a lawyer

As I said, you go BACK to the same Court, explain that "she" is in contempt and ask for a hearing. They will provide you with the papers. The problems that I stated you could have will have to be addressed.

And, yes, the wording in the Order is important.

JudyKayTee: We don't know were she lives or have a phone number. She provided a fact address when she went to court last time. We tried to have her served with papers for the restraining order, but they never could find her. I'll have my husband call the courts and tell them that she isn't fallowing up with the court order and see were it goes from there. :) thanks for your help.

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Originally Posted by jsje2010

JudyKayTee: We dont know were she lives or have a phone number. She provided a fact address when she went to court last time. We tried to have her served with papers for the restraining order, but they never could find her. I'll have my husband call the courts and tell them that she isnt fallowing up with the court order and see were it goes from there. :) thanks for your help.

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The Support Collection Unit SHOULD - at least in NY (and I realize you aren't in NY so maybe it doesn't matter) - provide you with her address. If they won't give it to you they SHOULD provide it to the Court (again, in NY). Restraining Orders have to be personally served; other papers can be substitute served (which can include mailing them) at the last known address. If you can prove she gave a false address the Court can order that she be served by publication. If you can't find her, the Court can order publication.

Your husband is fortunate to have you.

Keep "us" informed.

(If all else fails a private investigator should be able to locate her. Ask for the price IN ADVANCE, including if she cannot be located.)

So ( correct me if I am wrong ) If my husband and I open a case for custody ( because that is what we are working on) and the courts can not find were she is at either they can notify her by mailing it to the last address or through the publication. If she doesn't show up then what would happen. Trying to figure all this out because we do want to adventually get custody of him.

I would take this one step at a time - yes, the Court will assist you in finding her. If she does not appear there would (probably, nothing set in stone) be at least one adjournment and then you would get the relief you requested. If you cannot find her, though, I would recommend an Attorney to make CERTAIN that all of your papers are in order. Custody matters where there is a non-appearance are always open to argument - "I wasn't served; I didn't know" and so forth. I would do this once and make sure it's done properly.

(It's good to get ALL the info before you begin, which is what you are doing.)

Is getting an attorney the same as going to legal aid. MY husband and I are both 20 ( he turns 21 next month ) and we are exspecting out own little one in April so hiring an attorney would be out of the questions at this point in time, but I am scared that if it keeps going she could come back and say well he was never in his life on his own terms, and I don't want my husband to go through that type of pain since he loves his son, and our soon to be son more then anything in this world. I am a bit ditzy lol so...
Step one- go talk to the attorney general about her address if they don't help then talk to the courts...
Step two- Get all the evidence I have so far printed off and take it to the Legal aid... and see were it goes from there?

Legal aid provided legal counsel. But like Judy said first things first. Go for the contempt citation first. You don't need to know where she is for that because the very fact that she is hiding will be part of the contempt.

Once you get that, it will be easier to get custogy. You do need to remember that you are not a party to this action. You can help find info and hold your husband's hand, but he needs to be the proactive person.

:) Thanks scott. Yea it is aggervating I can not talk with him since he does not know what to say or ask for even though I tell him he gets flusted easy and is so busy trying to remain on subject and not answer back to her... I guess ignorance. I told him the judge believes him due to the fact she claims my husband was shaking the baby and yelling at him bad enough his head was shaking back and forth but did not take him to get checked out for SBS, and that first he was standing, then sitting, then had the baby pinned down shaking him. I know my husband very well I watched him help take care of a friends child, and he has been around my younger brother and sister since they were 5 and 6. The judge said the worse that would happen on one of the visits would be the child goes hungry but it won't kill him. And I for one would never let a child go hungry neither would my husband.