I livve iin New York and want to change my sons last name to mine. He's almost four months old annd has his mothers last name. We've established paternity and working on custody now. I want to change his name but she refuses and the court told me I can't change it without a lawyer but can't afford one and make too much for a public defendant. Is tthis true I can do nothing without her consent or a lawyer or is there a waay for me to do this?

You cannot do this without her consent.

Public Defense attorneys are only for criminals, so you couldn't use one even if you didn't make too much money.

If she's not on board with the name change, dude you're screwed.

A birth certificate is a legal document and, therefore, requires a court order to change it. Its not true that you NEED an attorney but it will be difficult without one.

You said you were working on custody now are you doing this through the courts? If so, you can simply add that you wish the name change to the custody petitions.

A resource for you might be a local law school. Some have clinics that can help you prepare the paperwork.

Generally speaking, as to the first part, either she must consent or the court must order it. As to the second part, technically you can always represent yourself, though not a good idea. You may consider as a long game, to have the child's name hyphenated, thus including both you and moms last name. The court can order as part of the custody agreement, the baby's name change.

I am not a lawyer in NY and so can't comment on specific laws there, but this is usually pretty standard stuff in family courts.