I have been best friends with a girl now for quite some time and we are inseparable - we do everything together and we always enjoy being in each others company. I am bi-sexual (she is not aware of this) and I have lately developed strong feelings for her. I wouldn't go as far as to say that I am in love with her but there are strong feelings involved. When I am with her, I am happy and when I am not with her, I am thinking about her but I do not have the courage to tell her how I feel in case it ruins our friendship.

Recently though, she has been telling me she loves me and I am the best friend she has ever had. She is really 'touchy feely' as well and sometimes if we are watching a film on the sofa she will cuddle up to me, start playing with random bits of my hair or other times if I crash round hers (or mine) after a night out she has no objections letting me hug her in bed (for my own bit of comfort). All this makes me think that she may actually feel something for me also, but on the downside she is very man orientated and is always flirting with any male when we are out no matter what they look like so I get confused.

I decided to put these feelings to the test last night at a NYE party we all went to. We got very drunk as you do and in the garden when no-one else was about she kept leaning into me saying how much she loved me again and kept staring intently into my eyes. I thought it's now or never, I leant in and kissed her and at first she was quite hesitant but she didn't flip out or freak out or anything - she actually smiled and laughed about it. I walked off round the side of the house to get another drink and she followed me and for about 15 20 minutes we were just hugging, with her burying her head into my neck and I kept giving her little light kisses on the lips and she seemed to like it. A minute later she said we should stop doing it because it's 'wrong' and we're 'best mates' but I leant in again and this time for at least 10 seconds we kissed quite passionately and she again didn't flip out or anything. She even said that I 'tasted nice'. We got interrupted by another party member and we headed in. A bit later she came and sat next to me on the sofa and we spoke about what had just happened and she said that she loved me but what just happened shouldn't have happened because she said it's all of a sudden out of her 'comfort zone' but she does love me so much and said if we didn't stop when we did, 'it could have lead to something'. A bit later in the kitchen she came up and hugged me again and when I shifted for her to move she didn't, she just stayed there and I could hear her breathing heavily into my neck.

This morning however she has been on the phone arranging to meet some bloke and has been a little bit funny with me and when I soberly said to her I'm sorry for coming on too strong last night, I don't know what came over me, she looked away and said 'don't worry, it's forgotten.' - Then all morning she kept talking about this guy and how she couldn't wait to see him and even went as far as to say something could happen between them. I have to admit I am a little gutted and jealous even though I shouldn't be. I would put it down to her being a little bit curious IF she wasn't so focused on the feelings. If your bi-curious, you generally just get down to the physical stuff right? But she tells me all the time that she loves me and she always cuddles up to me and sometimes stares at me for long periods with a look of lust? I am just SO confused and it's now starting to get to me. I'm scared of asking her how she feels in case it ruins us altogether and then I don't want to not say anything as I want to know where I stand. Please help...

Honestly it seems to me as if she may be bi as well. But the issue is, some people put a taboo on the best friend. She may be afraid of ruining the relationship.
OR it could be that she is stubborn and doesn't notice ylour signals and is bisexual and interested in you, but doesn't know you are interested in her.

Sounds to me like its time to sit down to gether and have a TALK about it. Be honest with her. Open up and get it out there. If it ruins your friendship, then I'm sorry. But really do you want a friend who won't accept you for who you are?

Who says you can't focus on the feelings if you're curious?

It sounds to me, though, like she does NOT want to go there with you. She loves you, yes---as a FRIEND.

She wouldn't be all over guys otherwise.

Talk about it--but don't be surprised when she tells you she doesn't care for you THAT way.

You cannot base anything on drunken actions, or what your smitten eyes see as lustful looks. Stop assuming, and presuming and talk, isn't that what friends do, so you can clear the air, and get the truth.

If you can't talk, you have nothing any way, not even friendship.