I got married two and a half years ago. A year before the wedding, I met our best man's girlfriend. After getting to know her, I asked her to be a bridesmaid. Now, we are pretty good friends. She and the best man are getting married soon. The soon-to-be groom has already asked my husband to be best man, but she hasn't asked me to be a bridesmaid. I know that it is totally up to the bride who to ask, but I nevertheless feel that it is a little rude of her not to ask me. Am I wrong for feeling this way? How should I handle being at the wedding but not part of it, especially when my husband is best man?

You are assuming too much, lovelaw. She is not obligated to reciprocate participation for you in her own wedding. She obviously had long time friends that she asked. Please don't take this as a slite, it is isn't mature thinking.

Of course you can be at the wedding and enjoy yourself. Your husband is not going to spend the whole time with the wedding party.

Just go and be happy for them.

Tick

No there is no rule, and in fact over a few years we often meet and know other people and friends. It is not even to be expected

This is a non-issue. People have sisters, inlaws, cousins, college roomates, high school friends and on and on... we can't ask everyone and it shouldn't be taken as a slight not to be asked, at all!

You have only known her 3 1/2 years.

Most likely she picked her bridesmaids and maid of honour long before she met you.

It may very well be that she has only so many she can have. Most likely it isn't that she wouldn't have loved to have you as a bridesmaid, but the plans were made long ago.

I wouldn't take it as a slight in any way.