My sister has a 5 year old son. The father has never paid child support, or has never had a REAL relationship with his son over the past few years. He doesn't pay chold support, and they have no agreement on visitation, my sister will let him see their son, when he has time. ( which before today, was 1 month and a half ago) My sister and her son both live at home with me and my parents. We support them, and her son is WELL taken care of. My sister has been in another relationship for over a year and has recently become pregnant. When she told him, This set a fire under his butt and now is filing for full custody of my nephew. He has always used this as a threat to get what he wanted from her before, but now, he is actually doing it, because he doesn't want another man raising his son (in all realiti, he has had someone else raise his son for years! Me and my parents are daddy) I guess Im wondering, what are the chances of him getting full or even partial custody? Im really scared if that were to happen, as my sister does not trust her son alone with him. ( alcoholic & bad temper) I understand that the court will rule visitation (can those be supervised?) But, Will the court uproot a 5 year old from everything he knows to live with someone who he has never even been alone with?

Anything is possible. Your sister isn't exactly showing that she is a responsible adult yet. So unless there is proof of things that weren't said here then at a minimum he will get visitation and if he does good then more and more over time.

Your sister has a huge problem in that the same complaints your setting against this man are in truth the same as being said for your sister. You cliam to be raising her child along with your parents. SO it shows she can't raise a child by herself and then she goes and has another one??

I think you can see the red flags being raised here. She is going to need a lawyer to help her through this one.

Ok, so your sister has TWICE become pregnant out of wedlock! She lives at home and the child is well cared for ONLY because of the extended family. Its unlikely, but possible that he will be seen as the more stable parent.

As for the alcoholism and temper, is there proof of that? Do you have any documentation, arrests, police reports, etc. to support it? I agree, he will get visitation. It may be supervised at first, but it can increase if he proves himself.

Thanks! Well, yes, she is again pregnant, But the relationship with the father has been over for a couple years, and whether she's married to the new guy, does that have any hold on whether she is unsuitable parent? Our household is very stable for him and as with any family environment, the more people around, the more spoiled a child would be. My sister does raise him. She works and takes care of him, but we are also there to back her up, if needed. Because as anyone will agree, its hard being a single parent. The father also lives at home with his mom, he gets paid under the table and as I said before refuses to pay child support. We do have some police reports we can get, but the latest is from 2 years ago. There has been very little interaction between him and my nephew. My sister has some personal complaints against him that are physical, she was going to go to the police but he told her that she had no proof ( I told her she should have went anyway) He is a very verbally abusive guy, there were many threats he has cast upon my entire family, believe me, this guy is not a nice guy. We don't have anything documenting those times, there are too many to count. My sister has been keeping a journal documenting all communications with him. My nephew is scared and reluctant to see him, because of a incident he saw with him arguing and throwing things at my sister. BUT he does like to see him. As for Alcholol proof... besides the stench that follows him, there is none. I believe my sister may have taken a picture of his collection, but not sure if she still has it. I acknowledge my sister didn't really think about the situation when she got pregnant again, but I don't see how a 'dead beat' dad of 5 years has the right to come in and shake my nephews world up because he is mad at my sister. He told me sister that now he is 'going to make her life hell'... My nephew does not deserve to be in this revengeful jealous situation.

It has less hold then it did years ago, but it still shows a lack of maturity and a tendency to repeat the same mistakes.

What will probably happen is a home evaluation will be done of both environments to help the judge make a decision.

Here is the problem as a judge is going to see it. If she claims abuse then the judge will look at everything. What they will see is that your sister made a choice not to focus and rebuild her life but to gather another boyfriend and along comes baby. She hasn't set herslf up to be outside the home. Still under her parents watchful eye. From what you have stated she has had years to do so. Instead new boyfriend and baby were all that was on her mind without regard to her current situation. When you look at it that way it doesn't sound exactly stable either.

You need to have a heart to heart with your sister and tell her to start looking in the mirror and get her life together for her children's sake or risk losing them. There are lots of single parents out there. They don't all live at home with their parents. Sure the family helps. But you see how it looks when its boiled down to just facts ?

This pattern must not repeat itself.

Thanks for your insights on the matter. They have a mediator appt set up for feb, and she's filing for child support. Maybe this will be what makes her grow up and take responsibility. My nephew is my world, and if I could take him I would. ( 30 years old no kids, lol) Thanks again.