Well we could both honestly tell anyone that we were the happiest we have ever been being with each other we weren't only dating we were best friends, everything seemed perfect I'm still in college she just got full time job so we saw each other just enough and were still free to do what we wanted. Then all of a sudden one night just decides she "cannot commit" and does not want to be in a relationship right now , not with me not with anyone. She also said she doesn't want to go out and hook up she is not like that and never will be. She says she wants to be independent, but after 2 years how can she do that and she admits it was nothing that I did that caused this. Please need help and don't know what to do, she also tells me she doesn't know what future will bring but seems like she is going to try to push her love away and feelings aside so she doesn't make it seem she made mistake. Help any advice or tips or what thanks.

Honestly, the only thing I can think of is that she had some epiphany or self-discovery. Sounds odd though. Something must have happened to have her realize that her life wasn't going the direction she wanted. And if she just got her degree and entered the working world that can be an eye opening experience in and of itself.

People changing is inevitable, maybe this is just her way of changing. Creating a new identity for herself

Her feelings about herself have changed and she needs time and space. Give it to her, and accept her wishes with grace and respect, even though your heart is broken. Its so normal for young people to go through this, and break ups suck, but leave her alone to find herself. Its not you, its her. You just have to live with her decision.

This is a time to find yourself also, but without her.

Thank you very much.. its so hard though because she's doing so well with it having a lot of busy time. I just hope she doesn't try to get over me and wants to be with me. Once she can commit. I'm just getting nervous that she's gone forever.

Everythig was PERFECT with our relationship we are 22 years old.. madly in love. And been together for 2 strong years. She told me it was not even anything I had done that she was very happy. Just now deciding she "cannot commit".. "cant be in relationship right now with anyone"... "wants to be independent"... I didn't have her tied down at all we saw each other just the perfect amount to not be all over each other and could go enjoy other friends. It was ideal for both of us. Then BAM. She can't commit and all that. And I feel she is taking this a lot easier and we talk every other day about. She doesn't mind talking but I know its not a good thing. But what do I do?

So there's no problem -- the two of you are still not in a committed relationship, are independent, and can date others. You didn't have her tied down then, nor do you now. What's the problem?

If you are uncomfortable with the new relationship, leave it alone.
You may not have had a problem with what you had but she did.
Give her the freedom she wants, that is all you can do.

We had very committed 2 year relationship.. I gave her enough space to not crowd her.. she decided to end the relationship out of the blue.. and says she can't be in relationship after 2 years of one with me. A very happy one.

You said, "i didnt have her tied down at all." That doesn't sound committed. Were you or weren't you with each other?

Tied down as in it was a healthy relationship and I allowed her to go out with friends and such I didn't tie her down or didn't complain or tell her she couldn't go places like a lot of guys or stuff.. yes we were for 2 great years together.

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tied down as in it was a healthy relationship and I allowed her to go out with friends and such

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You ALLOWED her to go out with friends and such? I've been married for 43 years and have always been free "to go out with friends and such." That has nothing to do with being committed to the relationship.

Your missing the point.. she BROKE UP WITH ME.. aka we were togetherrrr... and she broke up with me for no reason but she couldn't be in relationship.. wants to be independent.. therefore I'm using me not "tying her down" as reference to freedom she had.

Can you just help and not critize what I said or didn't say in my thing its quite obvious I was in 2 year relationship.. everythign was going amazing.. she admitted it wasn't anything I did.. she just needed it and cannot be in relationship.

I'm not criticizing you. I'm only quoting what you wrote.

Do you understand what a committed relationship is?

Okay, she "needs" to be on her own, no commitment any longer, needs to be independent of you. Now go No Contact, since we all know it won't work if the two of you try to be "friends."

I'm guessing she had this worked out in her head and heart long before you ever got notice of it. It was a shock to you, getting blindsided by it. Now go No Contact, as I said above. Talking with her will only keep you spinning your wheels and being stuck in mud. No Contact will allow you to move forward and heal from this relationship. You must heal, by the way, before you get involved with someone else.

But what if down the road our paths cross like she was best thing to enter my life.. I don't want to let go that easy. And someone else is the last thing on my mind. I duno sorry I'm just not in best of moods. :-/

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but what if down the road our paths cross like she was best thing to enter my life.. I don't want to let go that easy. And someone else is the last thing on my mind. I duno sorry I'm just not in best of moods. :-/

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People always say that when they don't want to break up. My ex told me this, not once, but a zillion times, still no effect on me, because I can't love him no longer. And eventually he moves on.
You lived fine before she appeared, so you should continue to live fine after she leaves. You have your own life, and there are still 9 billions people around the world for you to meet. How do you know you will never be able to find "the one"?
She's comfortable enough to tell you all about this, it means she wants you to prepare, so you Should be prepared.

I can understand your hurt, and confusion, any one would be hurt and confused when their world changes, and they don't want to.

But if you leave her alone and get a proper healing then you will not only accept the change, but actually grow from the experience. But while this break up is still fresh in your mind, there will be pain to go through. Everyone here knows that because they have been through it, and some of us have been through this many times.

That's why we tell you to leave her alone, and bow out of her life with dignity, and grace to keep yourself respect. Its called No Contact. It is through no contact that you will grow and learn like all of us have done, and there will be no need to start new questions about the same thing, looking for different answers and opinions, because we all know break ups suck for whatever reason they happen. The solution is always the same, leave them alone so you can heal, and make better decisions based on facts and not just feelings.

It helps the brain, and heart get on the same page, and stops the confusion, conflicts, drama, and bad decision making because all you feel is hurt.