I had a stroke a few months ago and I have, since then, put on about 50 lbs. I was already gaining before that, so already about 30 pounds heavier than I am used to being. I think the first 30 was due to medication for depression. The last 50 I think are split between medication and the lagging effects of having a stroke. I'm only 30, and have time still to recover more. However, my father mentions my weight constantly and my friends are making fun of my weight gain, so I don't even like to go out at all anymore. I hate myself and I often wish I wouldn't have made it through the stroke. Why not, right? Apparently the people around me are ao shallow they think it would've been better that way. My boyfriend is the only one who has my back, but I don't feel good enough for him anymore and may be driving him away. I have yet to find a reasonable answer to my problem. I stop taking the med, my headaches will come back. I can't take much exercise at once. Not rich enough to afford surgery. I don't eat if I can avoid it. What do I do?

A known side effect of many antidepressants is weight gain. This varies between individuals and specific medications. Some worse than others. 50-100 pounds and more is not uncommon.

Based on your description you are taking antidepressants to address depression which is related to weight gain. Instead the medication is causing you to gain weight which makes you more depressed and has led to withdrawal from friends and social network. The social isolation likewise increases the severity of depression. The resulting behavior, in turn, impedes your recuperative capabilities in relation to the stroke, prolonging recovery and also leading to an increase in depression. Then the circle starts again.

You have described a classic circular, degenerative and self reinforcing/defeating cycle.

Perhaps you should investigate an alternative therapy for the depression, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), in lieu of pharmacotherapy. This would allow you to assess the relative contribution of the medication to your weight gain and also assist in reorganizing your thoughts and behaviors and get you moving in a positive direction and toward recovery.

CBT is but one alternative therapeutic approach but, in one way or another, you must break this self-defeating cycle. That requires treatment from a knowledgeable mental health professional (not necessarily a psychiatrist).

Your reference to headaches in relation to antidepressants is unclear.