I recently reconnected with someone I use to date about 4-5 years ago. We had a really good relationship then and still do now even with time passing and all. He was dating someone before I started dating him and he really had deep feelings for her, Well there relationship ended and ours begin about 4 months later, She chose to leave him for someone else , Well little did he know that the "someone else" was in fact his best friend. Needless to say he question her about it and she cried her heart out saying that she was sorry and that it was a big mistake and that she still loved him and wanted to be with him. Well mixed emotions about everything my advice to him was to take time and think about the situation and whatever decsion he made I would respect it. Well they had a little fling for about a week , and he realized that it wasn't what he wanted and came back to me and told me the truth. Well with all that being said 3 months later she's pregnant and she says that the baby is his, Well with him being the Mr. Do the right thing , he did what his family convinced him to do... MARRY Her. He now has a daughter with her that he wouldn't dare question the paternity of... Because he loves the child unconditonaly.
So that's where we get to the present... For the past 5 years I have thought about this man and the relationship that we had, I often wondered if he made the right choice, and was he happy. I missed the Best Friend I had found in this man and I missed the Love that we shared. Point blank I have felt incomplete Since we Parted.
We recently reconnected through a mutual friend , The Love is still there and even more stronger, He wants a life with me and has ask me to forgive him for trying to do what was right, he has told me that he thought of me and never stopped loving me... He said that he Prayed for the day that our paths would cross again, And now it has...
I am confused and I need help... what should I do..
Should I respect the Life he has with her and the fact that he is a married man... or should I...
Quit putting my feelings aside for her and go forward with the relationship?

Fact... he is a married man... with child to boot! Yes, of course, he is off limits! You should respect that he has family and responsibility to them. Despite your mutual feelings you need to do the right thing here.

Think if you were his wife with his child and someone came in from his past and tried to take all that away from you? If he doesn't want to be with his wife then he should get a divorce. Who knows what he is thinking, does he really love you and want you back or is this just a phase? Also, after 5 years why have you not moved on?

He's off limits, stay away, move on to an available guy.

I realize how much you love this man, and that you never really allowed yourself to remove him from your life. You continued to think about him,worry.imagine what if. Oh, how I know what your going through. Its on border of being obsessed with this person.

How do we as strong woman allow ourselves to get to this point. Now keep in mind, I myself still trying to get over this in my life. I think its because we really loved this person, and yet had no real control on how it ended, our feelings were even in their consideration when making their choice to end the relationship.

He is married, he has a child with this woman. I know how it feels to let this person back into your life, and all they do is once again use you to help their ego!! All I can do is try and warn you what is more then little going to happen, but you will still have to be the one to make the choice. This is the time that you actually get to make a choice.

Its hard when you have fooled yourself into believing this person is your other half. Been there, oh the charm, the bonding, I will only feel this for him and him for me. But wait, your's like mine, found another WOMAN. Mine moved in, yours married.

I finally knew that I had let this turn into an obsession, and actually went and got some help. The control this is a big issue to get over, who knew!

Bottom line is if he is done with his marriage let him get a divorce like all grown up men. When he is done with that, then have him come look you up. Don't become his whore. Yes I know that is harsh, but I wouldn't want anyone to feel so worthless as that!

Good luck