Hi everyone,
My boyfriend of nearly a year is still trying to communicate with an"ex" or old "friend" is what he called her. He's trying because on the site "myspace" he is requesting her as a friend and I know because I have his password.But he told me he don't have no dealings with her and that basically she is history. I know I'm wrong on my part already for checking his stuff. But why is he still trying to keep in touch? And am I wrong for being mad at him?

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But why is he still trying to keep in touch? And am I wrong for being mad at him?

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I have no idea why he is keeping in touch with his ex. And YES you should be mad he lied and is guilty of a breach of trust, no matter how innocent this myspace thing is, You are also guilty of breaking a trust and as soon as you confront him, he will know you are a snoop.
Just me but I don't believe in a relationship that has no trust.

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Originally Posted by missb

Hi everyone,
My boyfriend of nearly a year is still trying to communicate with an"ex" or old "friend" is what he called her. He's trying because on the site "myspace" he is requesting her as a friend and i know because i have his password.But he told me he dont have no dealings with her and that basically she is history. I know im wrong on my part already for checking his stuff. But why is he still trying to keep in touch? And am i wrong for being mad at him?

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Well it sounds like you both don't trust each other. So since that's the case why are you going out?

You both need to talk and discuss things.

As for Myspace, anyone can see the friends list after they become a friend, so obviously he is not hiding it. If he really wanted to "hook up" or talk to them he could just pick up a phone and do that.

I really think just listing them as a friend on myspace has little value, I started just inviting anyone I ever knew and people with outlandish photos just to see how many people I could add to my list. I have never emailed or messaged any of them.

So just my opinion, I don't think it means anything, unless he is doing more with or about her.

There is a danger with myspace that you can read into things too much, check back on one of my previous threads, here is a link: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...alk-47487.html

I really do also think that you lack trust in your relationship and without trust, a relationship is sure to fail in the end. He has breached your trust but you have also breached his by checking his personal details. Remember that just because he has requested to add her as a friend does not mean he wants to speak to her. If he were going to do anything behind your back, he would not add her as a friend since he would not foolish enough to not understand that you have his myspace url and would be able to view his friends list. If he were to do anything behind your back with his ex, he would be a Cheat and would not be worthy to be in a relationship with you. I doubt anything is happening here at all and it is completely harmless. I do think that you need to be honest with him about what you have done and communicate about your concerns but he also needs to explain why he lied to you which I think is wrong.

Early communication may stop anything developing here in terms of bad feelings.

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Originally Posted by missb

Hi everyone,
My boyfriend of nearly a year is still trying to communicate with an"ex" or old "friend" is what he called her. He's trying because on the site "myspace" he is requesting her as a friend and i know because i have his password.But he told me he dont have no dealings with her and that basically she is history. I know im wrong on my part already for checking his stuff. But why is he still trying to keep in touch? And am i wrong for being mad at him?

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I mean they could be fri3nds and still talk.but if he was talking to her he could have told u.and still u both need 2 respect each others privacy.

I don't know if you are in a serious relationship or anything but I beg you... please do away with your myspace accounts as soon as you want to settle down. It will only start drama... it provides a free ticket into your past, since you put it out there, and it is a way old flings can get in touch even if you don't want them too. It doesn't belong in a mature relationship. And yes you should be upset. But it is a matter of if you want to get in trouble yourself (for snooping) to confront him.

Yes I Am In A Serious Relationship Been With Him 12 Years I've Been On Myspace For A Long Time. But I Never Hide It From My Spouse Is 50/50 And If There Isn't Thrust Then Why Be With That Person Right.if Your Tired Of Being With That Person Tell Them Don't Let Them Find Out Them Self That Hurt's Even Worse.