I have this friend. A BEST friend actually. I've know her since we were babies, and we're so close. I thought I could trust her with my life, but recently she backstabbed me, and I'm just in complete awe. I'm in love with this guy, I tell her weekly how much I love and care about him, she knows how I feel about him... We talked to him over the phone one day, and he asked if she would add him as a friend. I get very jelous, so I told her that she could, but to NEVER EVER talk to him, because it could interfere with our friendship. She looked me in the eyes, told me she loved me, and SWORE that she wouldn't talk to him. Well, last night I was talking to him on the phone, and he said not only did she talk to him on Facebook, but that they texted frequently. This was just a slap in the face. And the big thing here, is that her parents went through a big dramatic devorce because her dad cheated on her mom's with her best friend. So why she would do this after seeing it happen, completely blows my mind. But I want her to feel guilty about this, so she'll know she seriously hurt me. She isn't emotional at all, and I don't know what to tell her to make her feel guilty and just know what she did was absolutely unacceptable. Can someone please tell me how I should confront her with this? Thanks!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by dawglb3219

I have this friend. A BEST friend actually. I've know her since we were babies, and we're so close. I thought I could trust her with my life, but recently she backstabbed me, and I'm just in complete awe. I'm in love with this guy, I tell her weekly how much I love and care about him, she knows how I feel about him... We talked to him over the phone one day, and he asked if she would add him as a friend. I get very jelous, so I told her that she could, but to NEVER EVER talk to him, because it could interfere with our friendship. She looked me in the eyes, told me she loved me, and SWORE that she wouldn't talk to him. Well, last night I was talking to him on the phone, and he said not only did she talk to him on facebook, but that they texted frequently. This was just a slap in the face. And the big thing here, is that her parents went through a big dramatic devorce because her dad cheated on her mom's with her best friend. So why she would do this after seeing it happen, completly blows my mind. But I want her to feel guilty about this, so she'll know she seriously hurt me. She isn't emotional at all, and I don't know what to tell her to make her feel guilty and just know what she did was absolutely unacceptable. Can someone please tell me how I should confront her with this? Thanks!

---

Honestly, I think that would be a waste of time and energy for you..

Personally, I wouldn't confide in her anymore about anything personal. That right there would make her feel guilty.

I know this is not what you want to hear, but I find it to be a complete waste of time, as I mentioned already, and I really don't think it's worth it.

I just want to point out to you, that this guy is NOT married to you, so in all actuality, he can talk to whom ever he pleases.

Stop letting your jealousy get the better of you. Don't allow this to ruin your friendship with this girl.

Is this really all worth it?

Quote:

---

he asked if she would add him as a friend. I get very jelous, so I told her that she could, but to NEVER EVER talk to him, because it could interfere with our friendship.

---

Mistake #1 - telling her to never ever talk to him. The first thing any person would want to do after a directive like that is to TALK TO HIM! It's like Mom baking cookies, putting them on the kitchen table to cool, and telling Junior to keep his hands off. Everyone knows the minute Mom leaves the room or turns around to wash dishes, Junior will take a cookie.

As soon as your friend added the guy as a "friend," it was all over, kaput.

The problem is yours, not hers. Like Enigma said, keep your business (especially romantic business) to yourself. Even best friends don't get to know everything about each other.

No offense or anything, but you can't stop someone from speaking to someone, & its not like they were talking about getting together, they were just talking?