Im 28 he s 43 we have been together for almost 3 years. We have GREAT sex when we are intimate, but we will go a week to two without anything. I always have to be the aggressive one and sometimes when he denies me I feel so rejected I won't even try. His way of letting me know he s ready is by putting my hand on his cock and that means ill have to blow him, which I don't mind, but its all about him. I'm not a bad looking girl at all and I'm down for pretty much anything, I know I'm a pretty good lay and I know how to suck some good ****, but I'm hittim my prime and I'm ready to go at all times. Is he cheatin are we out of sync or is he just not into me anymore. Please give me some feed back its killing me all I can think is he is bored or not attracted to me anymore, : (

I think your gut feeling is correct, although it may not be cheating, it sounds like he is just not into you any longer. I don't know how he could be bored, after all, he is 43 and you are 28 which would be possibly an older man's dream.

Could be too, he is turned off by your colourful language. You do have a way of explaining yourself succinctly.

Tick

At 43 it is possible he has some medical issues cropping up he may not be aware of... High blood pressure, or high blood sugar.

If he hasn't had a complete physical and full bloodwork recently he should get it.

When I was 43 I was still getting it every night with my wife who is only 3 years my junior. And at that time we had been married 14 years.

Whole LOT of things it MIGHT be...

Do you live together? Have you talked with him about the issue? How is the rest of the relationship? Does he show affection in other ways?
Has it been like this throughout the relationship or is it a recent development?

Have you looked at other libido limiting factors in the relationship such as timing, health, stress, medications, etc.

Being blunt, in a way it sounds like he has you trained to do what he wants when he wants it. That leaves you with a choice to make: Talk with him and work together to improve the relationship through compromise (part this is finding out if his libido is naturally lower or if there are other factors that can be overcome); Let things stay as they are; or Let this relationship go and find someone who will treat you like a partner.

Going a week or two without sex isn't unusual of for a couple that's been together for a while. So, he's probably not cheating and he's probably still attracted to you.

But, I think you answered your own question here, you're hitting your sexual peak and hence, want sex more often than he does. If he's not in the mood he's not in the mood, he can't get an erection on command.

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Originally Posted by needic

Im 28 he s 43 we have been together for almost 3 years. we have GREAT sex when we are intimate, but we will go a week to two without anything. i always have to be the aggressive one and sometimes when he denies me i feel so rejected i wont even try. his way of letting me know he s ready is by putting my hand on his cock and that means ill have to blow him, which i dont mind, but its all about him. im not a bad lookin girl at all and im down for pretty much anything, i know i m a pretty good lay and i know how to suck some good ****, but im hittim my prime and i m ready to go at all times. is he cheatin are we out of sync or is he just not into me anymore. please give me some feed back its killin me all i can think is he is bored or not attracted to me anymore, : (

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Slapshot made a good point about you starting to hit your prime. Also Smoothy made a good point about his health.

There might be other things going on here, with him, not YOU. Is he depressed about anything that you know of? How are things with his job? Is he stressed out about anything? Stress affects the libido.

I think that you need to speak with him about this. In a calm way, that is.

I know that there are two sides to every story.

Also, as far as HIM wanting from you, I suggest the next time he places your hand on his man hood, I would in return say, nuh uh, me first please and place his hand on your sweet spot.

To me, sex should be a give and take, not just a give give give.

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Originally Posted by Enigma1999

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Also, as far as HIM wanting from you, I suggest the next time he places your hand on his man hood, I would in return say, nuh uh, me first please and place his hand on your sweet spot.

To me, sex should be a give and take, not just a give give give.

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Or you could laugh and say the shop is closed... see what expression he comes up with.

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Originally Posted by smoothy

Or you could laugh and say the shop is closed.....see what expression he comes up with.

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That's a good one.

Although, if I were her, I would want a little something out of it first.

I know, I'm just wrong.;)

No we don't live together, but might as well we live 4 houses down from one and another so I'm always there. I started a new job and am making really good money, while he is having money problems his self. I have been told that could be a factor.

Its not only the lack of sex, but the lack of affection. He hasn't really ever been the most affectionate boyfriend. I did bring this whole thing up yesterday and he said its me and he thinks I'm the one who he thinks might be cheating.

That makes me believe that since he is blaming me for straying away he might be doing it. He always has said when I blame him for cheating I most be because I feel bad about something I am hiding. He can be quite bit manipulative turning it around.

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Comment on Cat1864's post

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That makes me believe that since he is blaming me for straying away he might be doing it. he always has said when i blame him for cheating I most be because I feel bad about something I am hiding. He can be quite bit manipulative turning it around.

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This seems to be a convoluted mess. You are both accusing each other of cheating. You have accused him and he thinks it is because you are hiding something. So, he backs off intimately and you think he might be cheating because he isn't instigating affection and is accusing you of cheating. Is there any TRUST in this relationship?

Frankly, if there isn't any trust or communications, I am not sure if there is a relationship. Are you open to couple's counseling? Is he?

Stress from job/financial problems can have a big impact on a person's libido. He may also be jealous about you being younger and finding a better job when he feels like his life should be doing better. However, you won't know if it is an issue unless you talk to each other and are open and truthful. It's back to communicate or let go.

Its just a complicate situation. He owns a bar ,which can be quite a burden on our relationship being out all hours of the night and getting completely hammered every night isn't exactly my fantasy relationship. I know we both have issues we have to deal with. When I brought up the lack of or no sex life for the past couple weeks he blamed it on me saying its because you don't come to bed till 5 am, which may be true, but when I get out of work at 230 I want to hangout for a bit. He s been around the block a few times and I know how he has been in past relationships. Especially sice he started owning a bar at such a young age he could get tail left and right and from some of them who I ve met he has some pretty low standards. I just wish he would act his age, and stop taking his frustrations out on me. I'm no angel but I ve always been there for him when ever he needs anything. I just want him to be crazy about me like he used to I know relationships fizzle, but that's no reason to give up. I know he still loves me and I love him. I think it's the frustration with money(something we fight about constantly I've loaned him some money a couple times and when we get into it I will say I want my money right now which I know makes him feel so little I realized how much that hurt him and our relationship so I won't bring it up anymore) that has caused his sex drive to go down so much, but I makes me feel so inadequate. He used to tell me we had some of the best sex he has ever experienced in his life. Now I have a complex because I'm thinking to hard when we are intimate and want to please him like I used to be able. Maybe out of the blue tonight ill try to seduce him and give him some of the best satisfaction I'm capable of!